Lie to Me quotes

Cal Lightman

(to Gillian) Politician. That's all you. Charge him by the lie. You can retire tomorrow

Cal Lightman

Just getting in, Loker?

Loker

Yeah, I got piss-drunk last night with my roommate, and I was just lying in bed this morning thinking how nasty hot Nancy Grace is, and just trying to decide if I was gonna come in at all cause it's not like there's anyone in here to fantasize about.

Gillian Foster

No offence taken.

Loker

I don't go for married women.

So Dr. Lightman just assumes you're a liar if you're a politician?

Gillian Foster

He assumes you're a liar if you're a Homo sapien.

Eli

I would like to sleep with you.

Cal Lightman

Ah, Eli Loker, Ria Torres. He's harmless, just always speaks the truth about what's on his mind. What do you call it again?

Eli

Radical honesty.

Gillian Foster

Do you still have that note, that I brought you? I want it for my office.

Cal Lightman

(handing over the note) You really are a pack rat.

Gillian Foster

You could have just told me what this was for.

Cal

No. You're a terrible liar.

Gillian Foster

Normal people think that's a good thing.

Ria

Sir. We don't think you were doing anything sexual at that club, because, I believe this escort, Melissa, who you paid for time with-

What about her?

Ria

She's your daughter.

Cal Lightman

The only way three people can keep a secret is if two of them are dead.

Cal Lightman

What's your content analysis of the mother?

Gillian Foster

She was definitely concealing something. When I asked her about Miss McCartney, she started referring to her as 'that woman'.

Cal Lightman

As in, 'I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky'

Gillian Foster

You think I'm naive just because I don't share your twisted view of the world.

Cal Lightman

That and you read romance novels.

Gillian Foster

Yes I do, because they make me happy. A pursuit I highly recommend to you.

Cal Lightman

Truth or happiness, never both.

Gillian Foster

We'd like you to come work for us, Miss Torres.

Ria

Why?

Gillian Foster

You've made seven times more arrests than the average TSA agent and you scored 97% on the TSA deception diagnostic, which Dr. Lightman created.

Cal Lightman

Have you ever had any specialized deception training?

Ria

I've dated a lot of men.

Gillian Foster

(to Cal) Congratulations. One liar down. Six and a half billion to go

He talked a bunch of crap about Miss McCartney.

Gillian Foster

Really? But what did he say?

Kid's a freak. I mean, I can't remember exactly but, I'm sure I heard him say something psycho about her.

Gillian Foster

You wouldn't just be saying that because you got suspended for hitting him in the face?

Personally, I think what you do is a joke. It's a frigging carnival act.

Cal Lightman

I get that a lot. You know, a moment ago, I saw you smile at your colleague, flash her a glance and shift your gaze. She responded by raising her chin boss, revealing deep embarrassment. I'll take another 'wild guess'. You two had a fling. She doesn't want a repeat performance because, you know, what with your wife and all... But you want to move on.

Cal Lightman

Oh no, no. Keep your fingers off your nose. Men have erectile tissue there. Itches when they're hiding something

I thought you could tell if somebody is lying just by looking at them.

Gillian Foster

The question is never simply if someone is lying. It's why

The kid was at the scene of the crime. He had motive, means and he resisted arrest.

And he failed a polygraph test.

It's murder one.

Cal Lightman

Well, I guess we're all here. Someone wants the truth, somebody who wants to be right, and us, the idiots in the middle.