Leverage Season 1 quotes

Sophie

Corn subsidies. Why did it have to be corn subsidies?

Sophie, where are you?

Sophie

Trying to improve the air quality standards in Massachusetts.

Okay, for corn subsidies?

Sophie

[frustrated] No, to get me the fishery concessions, that I then trade for logging rights, to get me the redistricting deal, that gets me the grant funding, that gets me the solar subsidies, that finally gets me the bloody stinking corn subsidies. I don't know how anything gets done around here. You have to be a grifter to run government.

Hardison? How you doing?

Look, Nate, I'm good with systems. You know that. But this, this system hacks back. I got 7 million dollars sitting right here, set aside for mad cow testing, which nobody uses, because, I mean, you know, nobody wants to know that they got mad cow cows.

Yeah, so give them to the cheerleaders.

[beyond frustrated] I can't, man. There's a law right here that says that there has to be money set aside for mad cow testing, which nobody does! Makes no sense. There's no rhyme, no reason, no... [to himself] It's cool. Don't pop a nerve. Don't pop a nerve. Don't throw a book.

Parker

...while everyone is heeeerrreee. Where's Madison? WHERE IS MADISON? Great, I lost a cheerleader...

Parker

Okay, Ashley. Where's Madison?

Can I have some water?

In a minute. Why don't you tell us again, from the top?

I don't know where Madison went.

Parker

[loudly] Don't give us that. The girls say you're her best friend. Best friends talk, Angela. Are you gonna talk, huh? Are you? Huh?!

Easy. Easy. Easy. Your coach gets a little hot under the collar.

Am I in trouble? Are you gonna call my parents?

Hm. [Exchanges a glance with Parker] You can parent up. That's your right.

Madison talked to me in confidence.

Parker

A big word for a little girl.

Where's Madison?

Ready. Ready. Ready. Ready. Ready, let's go.

Ready?

Ready!

Sophie

Ready.

Eliot

Ready.

Parker

Ready.

Let's go.

Two, four, six eight. Who do we annihilate?

Um, Ms. Barron, the system’s giving me an alert. I’m not sure that transfer is legal.

Why not?

It says there’s a 1938 labor law requiring textile companies to keep cash on hand to pay overtime.

Is that for real?

I’m checking, but it does seem to be legitimate.

' What about the All-Cheer Competition League? We run a competition a week. They must have plenty of cash on hand.

' Oh, keep it coming. Keep it... do what you got to do.

We can’t use that money, either, because... Because we’re a sweepstakes?

We’re what?

We’re not a sport, so technically, this says, we’re a sweepstakes. There... there are a lot of restrictions on what you can do with sweepstakes money.

Go for C.T.V.C. All those broadcast contracts... they must have cash.

Um, ma’am, C.T.V.C. Is under investigation for indecency.

Well, when the hell did that happen?

Sophie

Oh. There. Right there, sir. That is a wardrobe malfunction. I can see her hoo-hah! Her hoo-hah, sir! Are you blind?! Do I need to call Congressman Caballo? Or Congressman Greenhill? I will call my whole rolodex, sir!

You underestimated me. People underestimate cheerleaders all the time. I didn't. I saw a niche, and I exploited it. Every girl wants to be a cheerleader. Every girl wants to be pretty. Every girl wants to be popular. And they will pay anything to get it. Cheerleaders built me a $300 million a year company because I didn't underestimate them.

Hm. You know, I really don't think I underestimated you. In fact, I think I estimated you just...about...Wait for it... [Baran's phone starts ringing] ...right. You’re gonna want to get that.

(answers phone)What?

We have a problem. There are Federal Agents here with a warrant.

For what?

Insurance fraud.

What? Why are the... The money. Where did you pull the money from?

The only place I could... The National Cheerleading Insurance And Underwriters.

Hi. How are you? J.J. LeGrange. [shakes Parker's hand]

Parker

I don't vote.

[chuckles] Oh, you will.

Your tickets, ma'am.

What was that about?

Sophie

I'm just planning a trip to the Gulf. The military are breaking ground on Fort Deveraux.

Sophie

[giving the briefing] It's 1971, the day before Thanksgiving. A 727 takes off from Portland bound for Seattle. It is hijacked by this man, a passenger who goes by the name of Dan Cooper.

Parker

Wait. I thought his name was D.B. Cooper?

That was misheard by a reporter at the scene, and then it was repeated until it became gospel. [To Sophie] I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt your swooning. Go on and swoon.

Sophie, just real quick, you had a poster of D.B. over your bed when you was like, 15. Tell the truth. You did, didn't you?

Sophie

So what? What if I did?

It's not a weakness to see the good in people. It's not a flaw or a bad thing to trust.

Dad loved his coffee.

Yeah. He'd let it get ice cold and top it off all day long. Drove me crazy.

Parker

What else do you remember about him?

Well, he was a hell of a shot.

Yeah, but a terrible driver.

[Laughs] That's true. One time, we're in this high-speed chase, and he plows us right into this restaurant dumpster. Plow! What a mess! So we get out of the car, we're looking at the damage, and this girl comes running up to us and says somebody attacked her and that maybe she thought he was the CIA or one of the Russians. She's tripping on acid. She's a runaway. So I'm ready to hand her over to the paramedics. Peter's got her in the back seat of the car. "Take us to him," he tells her. We found the guy! He's in the bus station! And the next day, he takes us to the woods where he's buried three other runaways. I say to Peter, "Hey. This girl, she was, she was strung out. She was ranting. I mean, how did you know?" He said, "All I heard...was that she was afraid." So... [lifts a glass] ...here's to Peter McSweeten...who couldn't drive a lick.