[Talking to her Publisher] I've got this theory that Jonathan Creek is himself an illusion. Just when you think you've found him, he drifts through your fingers like smoke.
SShelford
That was unfortunate. I completely misjudged the water pressure on those taps and, of course, it went everywhere. Fortunately! It's not urine, so it won't stain.
Jonathan So let's run through this from the top. The wardrobe was empty; you closed the door, brought it upstairs, through this door... along here... around here... and into this room, against that wall. By which time, somehow or other, the cupboard has acquired a body. Brutally battered to death across the back of her head. Hmm. [Pause] It's a good one isn't it?
'A Good One'?! Is that all you can say? Somewhere between here and the ground someone's planted a corpse in my cupboard and I didn't even see it happen!
[After checking out the wardrobe] Nope. All seems pukka. No panels, no breakaways, no phantom joints... just a wardrobe really. [Pause] You want to know how it was done?
Yes.
That makes two of us.
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