[In a sitcom style similar to Two and a Half Men. Applause; knock on door]
I'll get it!
[off screen] That better be her.
[Wilson opens the door. A police officer and a little girl wearing flannel with a stripe of pink in her hair are standing in the hallway. The audience oohs.]
Rachel Cuddy, you were supposed to be home half an hour ago.
Don't blame me; he's the one who wouldn't run any red lights.
[The audience laughs. The police officer walks Rachel inside the apartment.]
The mouth on that kid makes Mel Gibson sound like Nelson Mandela. Where'd she learn that?
[House enters blowing a bubble with gum. The audience cheers wildly.]
I don't know why you're here, but I didn't do it.
What's the problem, officer?
She was shoplifting down at the mall. Are either of you this girl's father?
Nope! But since her mom died, she's my favorite tax write-off. [walks over to the door and sees the officer out] Officer, you have my word it won't happen again, 'cause next time she won't get caught.
[House slams the door shut behind the officer, then turns and high-fives Rachel. They hug. Wilson shrugs and joins in on the hug. Cuddy then wakes up from her dream, gasping and staring at the medication on her nightstand.]
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More House quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's House pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.



