[In confessional] So I was all alone at the dance. And worse, the meteor was about to smash into the Earth! And if the movie "Deep Impact" had anything to go by, the whole planet was about to become boring and unwatchable.
Captain Hero, you got to stop that meteor!
Can't you see I'm already one knuckle deep into fifth base?
[Clara sexually moaning]
Shoo! [he pushes Foxxy]
[Everyone laughing]
That's it! [in microphone] Hold up, everybody! Now I know y'all think Captain Hero is real cool.
[Everyone agreed-talking]
But he ain't.
[Everyone disagreed-talking]
I don't know what I was thinking. I fooled y'all into thinking Hero was cool by pretending to be his girlfriend so he would stop that meteor!
[Everyone gasps]
Wait! I can explain!
Oh, really? Then explain this now. [tears off Hero's Lando costume]
Spanky? Clara? Steve from Long Island? [goes over to Xandir and Wooldoor] Oh, hey, man. You were right. The cool kids are assholes.
You shit on my house, man.
I know, I know.
You shit on my house!
Yeah, you said that already.
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