Ood Sigma quotes from Doctor Who

We will sing to you, Doctor. The universe will sing you to your sleep. This song is ending, but the story never ends.

[serving food] Would you like sauce with that?

I'll have a go, yeah. I did that job once, I was a... a dinner lady. Not that I'm calling you a lady. Although, I don't know, you might be... Do you actually get paid, though? Do they give you money?

The Beast and his armies shall rise from the Pit to make war against God.

[shocked] I'm sorry?

[taps translator ball] Apologies. I said, "I hope you enjoy your meal."

I'd now like to point out a new innovation from Ood Operations. We've introduced a variety package with the Ood translator ball. You can now have the standard setting. How are you today, Ood?

I'm perfectly well, thank you.

Or perhaps after a stressful day, a little something for the gentlemen. And how are you, Ood?

[sultry female voice] All the better for seeing you.

And the comedy classic option. Ood, you dropped something.

[voice of Homer Simpson] D'oh!

[holding the Doctor and Donna at gunpoint] Can't say I've ever shot anyone before. Can't say I'm going to like it. But, err, it's not exactly a normal day, is it? Still!

Would you like a drink, sir?

[chuckles] I think hair loss is the least of my problems right now, thanks.

[moves in front of the Doctor and Donna] Please have a drink, sir.

[now struggling to speak] If... if you're going to stand in their way, I'll... shoot you too...

Please have a drink, sir.

[now scared] Have you... poisoned me?!

Natural Ood must never kill, sir.

What is that stuff?

Ood graft suspended in a biological compound, sir.

What the hell does that mean?!

[realizing] Oh dear...

TELL ME!

Funny thing, the subconscious. Takes all sorts of shapes. Came out in the redeye as revenge, came out in the rabid Ood as anger, and then there was patience. All that intelligence and mercy focused on Ood Sigma... How's that hair loss, Mr. Halpen?

What have you done?!

Oh, they've been preparing you for a very long time. And now you're standing next to the Ood Brain - Mr. Halpen, can you hear it? Listen!

[shaking] What have you...? I'm not...

[utterly shocked] They... they turned him into an Ood?!

Yep.

He's an Ood!

I noticed.

He has become Oodkind, and we will take care of him.

It's weird - being with you, I can't tell what's right and what's wrong anymore!

It's better that way. People who know for certain tend to be like Mr. Halpen.

Will you stay? There is room in the song for you.

Oh, I've, I've... sort of got a song of my own, thanks.

I think your song must end soon.

[unnerved by this] Meaning?

Every song must end.

Ah, now! Sorry, there you are. So, where we? I was summoned, wasn't I? The Ood in the snow, calling to me. Well, I didn't just have to come straight here; had a bit of fun. You know, traveled about, did this and that, got into trouble, you know me. But it was brilliant. I saw the phosphorous carousel of the Great Magellan Gestadt, saved a planet from the Red Carnivorous Maw, named a galaxy Alison. Got married! That was a mistake. Good Queen Bess. And let me tell you, her nickname is no longer-- [clears throat] anyway, what do you want?

You should not have delayed.

Last time I was here, you said my song would be ending soon. And I'm in no hurry for that.

You will come with me.

Hold on. Better lock the TARDIS. [points the TARDIS key at the TARDIS, which chirps like a sports car as its light flashes. He looks back at Ood Sigma] Eh? Like a car. I l— locked it, like a car. [Ood Sigma looks unamused] That's... funny. No? Little bit? [exhales] Blimey, trying to make an Ood laugh...