Philip quotes from Delta State

Philip

Brodie, what was that all about? I’m not proud of this but I was so scared I almost wet my pants.

Philip

Looks like this Thomas guy is interested in Claire in a totally serial killer stalker kinda way.

Philip

(regarding Martin and Claire fighting) Oh, this is better than a soap.

Philip

Just thinking about recoging where these towels have been is making me want to hurl.

Philip

GUACAMOLE!

Philip

Shh, shh, don’t cry. It’s okay. Everything is going to be fine. Look, we turned out great. See?

Philip

Minoan. Discovered by a British Archeologist in year 1657. And the museum attendant just threw his gum in it.

Philip

What? I’m nervous. I crack jokes when I’m nervous.

Claire

How dare you listen into my phone calls?!

Philip

30 million people listened into your phone call. You were on T.V.

Luna

You bought cologne at a grocery store?

Philip

Well, it’s not actually cologne. It’s car freshener.

Philip

You are so busted. I can’t believe you guys would spy on me.

Claire

It’s not spying. It’s more like chaperoning.

Philip

It was like ... nothing, I dunno. Now that she's back to her old self I guess we just have nothing to talk about. I guess I was attracted to the rifter part.

Claire

It's always the bad girls.

Philip

I guess I'm just attracted to the 'dark side'!

Philip

I hate nametags.

Luna

You hate everything.

Philip

Hey, if I want a nametag, I’ll wear a bowling shirt.

Philip

Don’t pizza guys have to take some kind of oath or something, like neither rain, nor sleet something something?

Claire

That’s the post office, Philip.

Philip

Well, that’s brain dead. I mean, who’s more important: the pizza delivery guy or the mail delivery guy?

Claire

(after having her rifter powers destroyed) : I felt like I wanted to destroy you all.

Philip

Don't worry, we all have times like that.

Philip

What?