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S1 E15

Daria · Season 1, Episode 15

Dr. Shar, Quinn and others in “Unfinished Business”

[Quinn and Daria are at Dr. Shar's office]

SDr. Shar

[into phone] Of course it's gonna be harder to breathe, hon. Those nostrils are itty-bitty compared to the ones you had. Try breathing through your mouth. Go on, try it! In, out. That sounds good. Again, sweetie. In, out. You keep that going! Bye! [hangs up] So, hello there, Quinn, whichever one of you is Quinn. What brings you here?

It's my nose.

SDr. Shar

Oh, honey, nothing wrong with that nose. It's a pretty little schnoz!

It's a schnoz?!

SDr. Shar

No! It's the tiniest little thing.

Thank you. Can you fix it?

SDr. Shar

Oh, honey, I wouldn't touch it. It would be a crime against nature, and an ethics violation Dr. Shar just doesn't need right now! But, let's see if we can't do something. [camera focuses on Quinn] Quinn, would you like to see yourself with cheekbones?

I have cheekbones.

[Dr. Shar manipulates image on computer to give Quinn prominent cheekbones]

SDr. Shar

We all do, honey, and maybe that baby fat will drop away and yours will show. You never know. But for twenty-three hundred dollars, this one month only, you can be sure.

I don't have cheekbones!

[image of Quinn changes as Dr. Shar makes "improvements"]

SDr. Shar

All right hon, let's make some lips... dimple you up... two more... something's missing... oh! I know! [beauty mark appears on image] And as long as we're here, let's do something about that hair. [Quinn's long red hair is replaced with curly blonde hair] [prints out the image]

I'm too cute!

SDr. Shar

And only six thousand dollars, so far. Anything else?

Can I see what she'd look like with eyebrow ridges and a large, sloping forehead?

SDr. Shar

Alright, funny gal! Your turn.

No. Thank you!

SDr. Shar

Nothing to be afraid of.

I'm not afraid.

SDr. Shar

It'll be fun!

I don't like fun!

[camera focuses on Daria]

SDr. Shar

Oh, where shall we begin? Hmmm... nose, chin, eyes, cheeks, lips, hair... alrighty! Let's have a look, okay? [she quickly manipulates different parts of Daria's face and hair until the image looks exactly like Quinn] It's a start!

Oh, look, Daria, you're cute! Dr. Shar, do you think maybe I can get a couple more of these, wallet size?

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