How about, The Bleakness That Lies Ahead?
Too sentimental.
No Life, No Hope, No Future?
Too pie in the sky.
Mommy's Little Hypocrite?
Too much like a children's book.
I wish I were dead...
That sounds promising. Listen, you gotta give them something they'll really appreciate. Picture Kevin and Brittany drinking in your words like an elixir of knowledge. Heady... potent... seductive.
Are you marketing your own fragrance now? [sighs] I'm going to have to write something new for the occasion.
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