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S1 E17

Dan Vs. · Season 1, Episode 17

Elise and Chris in “The Fancy Restaurant”

Elise

Hey! What are you doing? I said be discreet.

Chris

I'm trying to chew quietly.

Elise

Never mind that. I've found something for you to do.

Chris

Oh, you're the best.

Elise

Don't eat that! I just put knockout powder on those. I need you to deliver them to the sous-chefs guarding the vault. Then open the door for Dan. You think you can handle that?

Chris

[sighs] You know, I'm sorry. This is not how I pictured our anniversary.

Elise

I have a confession to make. Until you mentioned it, I didn't know today was our anniversary.

Chris

Wait. Until you mentioned it, I didn't know it was our anniversary either.

Elise

Is it our anniversary?

Chris

I don't know. Let's think. What did we do on our last anniversary.

Elise

We were going to go to a party, but Dan wouldn't get out of our walls.

Chris

Right. And the year before, we were gonna go to a picnic.

Elise

And we spent the whole day with the bail bondsman.

Chris

Yeah, Dan had that whole nun thing.

Elise

You know what? I's not our anniversary.

Chris

And do you know what else? I don't care. I don't want to wait for a special occasion to take my beautiful wife out to dinner.

Elise

You are so sweet. Now go knock out those guards.

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