[sarcastically] Good morning, Principal Franklin!
[smiles; not understanding Sam's sarcasm] Thank you. Now, what trouble have you gotten in over the past week?
Let's see. I got yelled at by Ms Briggs for getting an "F" on a quiz.
Why did you fail the quiz?
I didn't know the answers.
Ooh! I got kicked out of the cafeteria for slapping Gibby with a piece of pizza.
Why did you slap Gibby with a piece of pizza?
I found it on the floor; I wasn't gonna eat it.
Sam, just sit quietly and try not to break anything.
Not if you're gonna tell on Sam!
No, I swore to Sam. We have to come up with a way to fix this without telling on Sam.
Why would Sam change my grade? And make it better? She hates me.
Oh, and uh, just for the record, the only reason you pinned me down like that is 'cause I wasn't ready.
Yeah, why? [she pins him to the ground again as he struggles to break free from her] Can we please not tell anyone about this?
W Mr. Wembley
Please complete exercises 7 and 9.
W Mr. Wembley
[whining] I'm in charge!
S Security Officer
We're gonna need to speak to a parent or legal guardian.
[from another room] I am in the bathtub!
[the security officers get confused]
[to security officers] Are we under arrest?
[to the security officers] Are you going to take us to juvie?
[scared] I don't want to go to juvie!
They're gonna take us to juvie! [they both start moaning in fear]
[picks up show idea card] "Carly and Sam roll Freddie in bread crumbs and bake him at 350 degrees"?
[Freddie looks at Sam in shock]
Just until he's golden brown!
[Spencer is finished setting up a drum set and begins drumming, which causes it to fall apart shortly afterwards]
Want to see me rock out? [Carly and Sam agree. Spencer starts playing the drums and one of the cymbals mysteriously catches fire] How can that even happen?!
[Carly gets the fire extinguisher and extinguishes the cymbal]
Hey, can I sleep over tonight?
You don't want to go home?
Nah... When my mom buys a new bikini, she usually likes to wear it around the house for a few days to "break it in." If you're my friend, you won't make me look at that.
[after Spencer's new "invention" bursts into flames]
Electrical wiring just isn't your thing.
[reading the band's letter to Spencer] "Dear Splinter."
He never did learn my name.
"Thanks for getting us booked on Seattle Beat. You rock for that. Unfortunately, your drumming is suckish." Aw.
That's where I said "Aw", too.
"So we've decided to go ahead with our appearance on Seattle Beat, but we're kicking you out of the band. Also, we took the rest of the deviled eggs and stole your drums. Take care, Blake." Well, that wasn't nice at all
Thanks. I'm just sitting here, listening to their music.
Well, don't do that! They're mean people.
I know. But their music is so good!
Spencer, it's been four hours. I think you need to get off the kitchen table?
Why? Is Santa Claus here to tell me I'm ugly and have no friends?
Spencer, get up. [tries to move Spencer] Come on, get off the table.
[at the same time] No... I'm comfy right... [screams and falls to the floor] Ow.
You weren't supposed to fall on the floor.
Well, you know... gravity.
I would've been here sooner, but, uh, I was helping my mom knit a sweater. Any comment?
Aw, please let me insult you once for free!
Nope! Five bucks an insult!
Then I think it's very sweet you were helping your mommy knit.
You're just lucky I'm broke.
Really, you wanna kiss me?
Are you kidding me, I'd rather... not do that at this time, but thank you for your kind offer.
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