[after getting stuck to a chair with monster glue] Come here.
No.
Come here. No. I'm not gonna hurt you.
That's what you always say before you hurt me!
Get over here!!
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
[looking at his mom when she was in college] Wow, wow. Look at her.
I know. She's beautiful.
Our mom was totally hot!
[looks at her dad when he was in college] And our dad was totally not.
Did I mention I hate you?
Thirty-seven times.
If you make me miss that Maroon 5 concert I swear...
You're not gonna miss it! Miley said she would be back... she'll probably be home any minute.
[on the answering machine] Lilly, are you there watering the plants? I tried your cell phone a bunch of times. Hey, I'm sorry but I'm not gonna make the concert. We decided to make a few stops along the way. I got a picture of the world's largest rubber band ball. That sucker is HUGE! Have a great time at the concert! Bye!
[still stuck to the chair laying on the floor] I hate you.
Thirty-eight.
Excuse me, Miss. I'm taking a little survey. If you had a daughter, what would you name her?
SSusan
Miley.
Thank you.
[while catching her breath] Dad's not going anywhere for a while.
How do you know?
While he was on the pay phone... [brings a gadget out] I pulled this out of his car. I don't know what it is, but...
Somebody stole my distributor cap!
But I'm guessing it's a distributor cap.
I was right. There is no brain in there.
I just wish you two would disappear!
Oh, honey, trust me, we're gettin' there.
Don't hurt my heart, my itchy twitchy heart, no...herky jerky? No...
You might wanna try 'Achy breaky'!
[in German interrogator-like voice] You vill tell me vhat I vant to know! The choice is vether you vill tell me before ze pain, or AFTER! Now vere is ze ball?!
Uh- wh- what ball? [gives Lily a thumbs up]
[in a whiny voice] The Joey Vitolo my dad gave me for my 13th birthday! [switches back to his prior voice] Zat ball!
[lying] I don't know what you're talking about!
Fine. Perhaps a trip to ze closet vill jog your memory.
[in tough voice] You'll never to get me to squeal!
Your right, you're strong but he is weak! [grabs Oliver]
Oliver, don't let him break you!
It's okay, it's just a closet—[sees closet] WHAT IS THAT?! [Jackson pushes him inside] Hu...help me... [Jackson pulls open closet] She's at... Vitolo's. [faints]
AAngela
[singing] You get the limo out front. Oh wah oh. Hottest styles, every shoe, every color.
Yeah. We get it.
JJoey
Hey. You don't have to listen to that 50 times a day.
LOLilly & Oliver
[in unison] Wanna bet?
There was a wasp!
[grabs remains of Beary and begins to swing it around the air] Where!?
Daddy!!
(While Jackson is flipping TV channels, we hear the opening bass beat of The Best of Both Worlds)
(groans) When is this not on!?
BBBarney Bitman
(reviewing Mikela; mockingly of her song "If Cupid Had A Heart) If Cupid had a heart... give me a break! If Mikela had a heart, she'd stop singing!
Come on Earl, not the puppy dog face! That worked when we were kids. (Then he gives in.) Come on Mile, just one song.
[sarcastically] Thank you, oh Man of Steel.
I tried, Bud.
MMiley (as Hannah Montana)
(Seeing Uncle Earl dancing beside her as the band practices) Uncle Earl, what are you doin'?
Watching your rockstar moves!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.