She's saying all this weird stuff about sex and that. She says she's saving herself until she's ready to make a proper commitment.
It's a sad day for all of us when a bird like that decides it's time to pull up her knickers.
You realize that's my girlfriend you're talking about?
And I feel your pain. [Puts hand on Curtis shoulder who swipes it off and points in Nathan's face]
Wash your hands before you touch me!
[Puts index finger to lips] The beast is back in his cage. He is sleeping. Shhh!
It's that lot we saw yesterday. She's dressing like that. They did something to her.
What, like brainwashing or something?
How d'you know that? You don't know that?
When weird stuff happens, it's always the storm. Haven't you worked that out yet?
Did you just recently GROW A SET OF BALLS?
I've always had a set of balls. You just never seen them.
That is about the gayest thing I've ever heard.
Why are you in my bedroom?
Okay, yeah, I suppose you could argue it’s a huge improvement. I get that. It’s not you.
That’s a good thing. I had a terrible attitude. I was so aggressive.
Yes, but in a good way. You’re the only person that gives me a slap. There’s no bullshit with you.
I was a horrible chav. I didn’t like who I was.
I did... I can’t believe I’m going to say this... I liked your attitude. I liked how you look, the way you scraped your hair back so that sometimes you looked a bit oriental. It worked for me. And your jewelry! You know, Argos has a bad press. Who says you can’t buy an engagement ring and a George Foreman grill at the same time? Your makeup! This is probably better actually. Look, what I’m trying to say here is that it should have been a complete car crash, but it wasn’t. It had attitude! Like you, it was you. And now you’re not… you. I have never... should have left you back there. I shouldn't have left you, I'm sorry. [kisses her on the cheek]
That was really inappropriate.
[Appears in control room pretending to be one of the “good guys” and Nathan sees him and walks up with a clipboard] Nathan. I'm so glad you're with us now.
I'm so pleased to be here. I was such a loser. The drugs, the sex... all that fast food. I was so miserable.
I hear you. You were such an annoying idiot.
Oh, it's a petition. We're campaigning against contraceptives being given out in schools. Will you sign it?
There's only one thing ladies should be inserting in themselves... and that's knowledge. [Curtis chuckles and Nathan sees Rachel walking in a tight skirt and turning around] Please excuse me.
She's got you thinking this is how you're supposed to be. Well, it's not! We're young. We're supposed to drink too much. We're supposed to have bad attitudes and shag each other's brains out. We are designed to party. This is it. Yeah, so a few of us will overdose or go mental. But Charles Darwin said you can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs. And that's what it's all about - breaking eggs! And by eggs, I do mean, getting twatted on a cocktail of Class A's. If you could just see yourselves! It breaks my heart. You're wearing cardigans! We had it all. We fucked up bigger and better than any generation that came before us. We were so beautiful! We're screw-ups. I'm a screw-up and I plan to be a screw-up until my late 20s, maybe even my early 30s. And I will shag my own mother before I let her... or anyone else, take that away from me!
It's wind-up. Who uses a paper aeroplane?
Well, whoever it is, they're going to get a slap.
I... I don't think you should slap them.
To her that's saying hello. [Alisha chuckles]
Are you trying to say something, yeah?
[Shaun appears from door] Who are you?
I'm your new probation worker.
What happened to the other one?
Apparently she's missing or something. Now, I know this is where I'm supposed to make a big speech about you paying your debt to society and making a difference. But seriously, we've all got things we'd rather be doing. Going to see your mates? A little recreational drug use? Making love to your beautiful Italian girlfriend, yeah? I'm talking about me. Now, let's just get through it and get out of here, all right? [Walks away]
[In main area of recreation centre filled with art enthusiasts] Who are they?
It's an art therapy class.
Er, you mean they're mentals?
D'you want to say that a bit louder? I don't think the weird-looking one at the back heard you. Look, just try and treat them with some sensitivity and respect.
[They've brought up Nathan's coffin and take off lid to see a unresponsive Nathan]
I heard him. I think he was knocking one out.
That does sound like him.
Maybe you just wanted to hear him. He's gone.
[Kelly leans down to poke Nathan's chin and he leaps up in the coffin with all Misfits around him reacting startled] AH...!
Haha! You should see the looks on your faces. Classic! Hey, guess what? I'm immortal! Can you believe this shit? I told you I had a power. Oh! Looks like they saved the best for last, huh? Immortality. That's off the A list.
[Voice of thought] I thought I'd never see her again.
So if you're not dead, how come you smell so bad??
I appear to have shat myself.
Were you having a wank in there?
So what if I was? A man can't enjoy a quick shuffle in his own coffin? It's not like I was expectin' visitors. And you, you little freak! What was that on the roof of the community centre?
I was trying to save you.
Well, you failed spectacularly, didn't you? I need to eat. Has anyone got a kebab?
D'you want some chewing gum?
Man, that was a bad scene in there. I thought I was going to starve to death.
You're immortal, you can't starve to death.
You're an expert, are you?
So, what are you going to do now?
I should probably tell my mum I'm immortal. Catch you later? [Walks away]
