RRoger
[to Keith] You better go find your boyfriend before he bites my cat or something.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
VVanessa
Oh please, she smoked a little pot in high school. We all did.
I didn't!
VVanessa
I know, Rico, 'cause you were boring.
Of course, they're going to say nice things about you; they're your kids. But me, I'm a miserable prick who cares nothing about anybody but himself; and I look at you in your hospital bed, tired and worn-out from surgery and I selfishly wonder "How long must I wait before I can fuck you?"
Wow. Finally somebody said something right.
It would have been weird if I'd said it.
Not in this family.
Darlings, could you give us a moment?
Oh, Mom, you're not going to –
I just want to be with Olivier for a minute.
I really don't feel like making dinner for a woman who hates me.
I hope those people aren't going to be here.
I think they're just celebrity spokespeople.
They're celebrities?
I toast you with this shitty wine.
Everyone should drop an organ. After the first shock, it's positively liberating!
I hit a new low. I made the bereaved vomit.
[about Jake] If you could do anything, what would you do?
I'd tell him what I think of him and what he did to me, that evil, evil fuck.
Well, you can do that!
I know. I said it all to the therapy pillow.
You're missing the point.
There is no point, that's the point... Isn't it?
Don't give me this phony existential bullshit, I expect better from you. The point's right in front of your face.
Well, I'm sorry but I don't see it.
You aren't even grateful, are you?
Grateful? For the worst fucking experience of my life?
You hang onto your pain like it means something, like it's worth something. Well, let me tell 'ya, it's not worth shit. Let it go. Infinite possibilities, and all he can do is whine.
Well, what am I supposed to do?
What do you think? You can do anything, you lucky bastard, you're alive! What's a little pain compared to that?
It can't be so simple.
[putting his arm around David and pulling him closer] What if it is?
[To Brenda, while talking about their wedding.]I'm glad today sucked, because I wouldn't want the happiest day of our life to be over already, would you?
[to Keith about their appointment with the adoption agency] If we're not on top of our paperwork, Shirley is going to kick our "Gay Daddy" asses into the street.
[Claire walks in on Ruth cleaning the kitchen in the Fisher home.]
Jesus Christ, Mom, will you stop cleaning and talk to me?
No. This isn't the time, and there's nothing to say.
Don't you think that it's significant that whenever I make a decision for myself, you hate me?
I don't hate you, I hate your choices.
Look at me! I am an adult, and my choices are none of your business! You had no right to call that lawyer! Dad loved me. He wanted me to be happy. That's why he left me the money.
He did not intend to finance you while you play house with a crazy person!
Look who's talking!
He wanted you to be educated, to learn, to go to college!
I am learning from life! You don't even know what college is. You never went and that was your choice and now you hate yourself for it, so you're gonna take it out on me!
That is not true!
Then stop being such a controlling bitch and give me my money! [Ruth raises her hand to slap Claire.] I will hit you back this time! Billy and I are moving to Spain, and you can't stop us!
Get out of my house!
[Claire grabs her belongings and leaves.]
[to David] You are such a mom! [They laugh.]
[Claire calls the family lawyer after learning that Ruth froze her trust fund.]
So then I called the bank and they said that there had been no money deposited. Can you fix this, please? I have to get a new camera.
LLawyer
Claire, you're not enrolled in college this quarter.
Who told you that?
LLawyer
Your mother. You should've told me yourself.
I'm taking some time off. So what?
LLawyer
So you can't access the funds. I'm sorry.
I beg your pardon. That is my money. My father gave it to me!
LLawyer
He set up a trust to pay for your education, not to support your lifestyle outside of the classroom.
It is not my lifestyle! It is my life, and I am learning more now than I ever did in that pretentious art barn!
LLawyer
You know you don't inherit free and clear until you're twenty-five. The language is very specific.
This is just like bureaucratic bullshit, and how am I supposed to move to Europe and fucking ripen when you won't even give me my money?
LLawyer
Your mother and I discussed this. We feel that it is in your best interest.
You don't even know me!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.