“Unfinished Business” quotes from Criminal Minds

Alex

(lays her head on Justin's shoulder) Promise me we'll find normal people.

Justin

We're not normal people.

Alex

Sorry couch and t.v., you're gonna have to get along without me! Yay!

(smiles and leaves)

Alex

Life is so good! (to Harper) I'm going to the dance with George!

(jumping up and down) Yay!

Zeke

Ready? Okay!

Here come the Turkeys! (claps) Justin's got the water! (claps) They can't win without him. (claps)

Zeke

....so let's applaud her!

Zeke

Hey, when in doubt, flip out right? (flips)

Hello prisoners. (picks up a guy's hat, drops it, and points at Mr. Laritate) Warden.

Mr. Laritate

(smiles meekly)

(takes another guy's device) Sorry I'm late. I had a phone call (looks at Eddie) with your mom. She said, "Get out of my chair!"

(goes to different chair)

(sits down comfortably)

Alex

(turns to Stevie) Who are you?

I'm Stevie. Last name...I don't want to know yours so why do you want to know mine?

Mr. Laritate

She makes you look like him. (motions to Justin)

Justin

(waves)

Mr. Laritate

All right, I'll be back to let you out of the cage at three. If you need anything, you should have thought of that before you acted up. (leaves and closes the door)

Alex

(gets up) Hey Stevie, why don't you tell me a bedtime story about how you ended up in detention so fast? (takes a pillow hidden from inside a globe)

Got caught for some stuff at my old school, so they're making me make up detention here. But it's cool. It's the quickest way to meet my people.

Alex

(gets a sound machine from behind a plaque on the wall) You're people? Oh, you mean people like me! Thank you! That's so sweet! (makes a hammock) Now, if you'll excuse me. I need a couple of more hours shut eye under a gentle rain. (turns the sound machine on and the machine plays sounds of rain)

Yeah you gotta turn that down. It makes me want to go numero uno.

Yeah that's right, I speak French.

(turns the sound machine volume higher) Well, Oui, Oui.

Alex

(laughs and does a handshake with Stevie)

(singing) Broke my heart down the road. Spent the weekend sewing the pieces back on. Crayons and dolls pass me by. Walking gets too boring when you learn how to fly. Not the homecoming kind. Take the top off and who knows what you might find. Won't confess all of my sins. You can bet I'll try it but you can't always win. 'Cause I'm a gypsy. Are you coming with me?

(transforms into Uncle Kelbo)

Uncle Kelbo?

Alex

What's so magical about that?

Uncle Kelbo

A dragon does it.

Alex

Shakira!

Justin

Shakira!

Alex

Maybe if we say it in Spanish!

Justin

(in a Spanish accent) Shakira!

Alex

(in a Spanish accent) Shakira!

Alex

(to Stevie) We need to do something about this music (looks at Harper) then her.

Harper

(dancing)

Alex

I'd love to see the look on Justin's face if he saw this band instead of those jazz geezers.

That would be awesome! We gotta make that happen!

Alex

If only we knew two girls with devious enough minds to come up with a scheme to get Uggh to play at our school.

Hmmmm. I think I see one.

Alex

And I see another one. (high fives Stevie)

Alex

As I hear people say all the time and I cannot spell, touche.

Harper

[bends to the ground] But that was Jeremy from science! He was going to ask me out.

Alex

Harper.

Harper

[turns to Alex] And now we will never know.

Alex

Harper, that's offensive.

Justin

I gotta use magic. [transforms into Alex] Okay I'll just pretend I'm Alex and convince Harper to help me with the float. No, I can't do it. It's just not me. [transforms back into himself and groans] But I do need to finish the float. [scratches his back with his wand] Ahh, ooh! [transforms to Alex] But it's a selfish use of magic and that's wrong. [transforms back to himself] But it would allow Harper to be with her friend, which would be nice. [transforms to Alex] No I can't do it! [transforms back] But I have to! [transforms into Alex] But I can't!

Harper

[walks out] Alex?

Uh oh. [drops his wand]

Harper

Oh my gosh! You came back to be with me.

[high pitched] Yes I'm....[clears voice] Yes I'm-I'm Alex and I came back to work on the float with you, and also to tell you how much you mean to me.

Harper

Aw, you never said that to me before. Thanks.

Well, you're welcome.

Harper

You never said that to me or to anyone. You must be really making an effort here. [grabs a mallet]

Wow, she sure has set the bar low for herself.

Harper

Why are you wearing Justin's clothes?

Oh. Be-because I stole them from Justin. Because I'm a dirty, lying thief.

Harper

[rubs Justin's head and smiles] I know you are.

Alex

You're not my friend Harper.

Harper

What?

Alex

Stevie's my friend. You're my sister.

Harper

(smiles)

Alex

(hugs Harper) I love you.

Harper

I love you too.

Alex

Okay. (crawl over the window)

Harper

Wait, what are you doing?

Alex

Well I'm not going to let you stay here alone.

Harper

But what if you get in trouble?

Alex

For what, sneaking into detention? Yeah I would love to see how that works.

Harper

I guess if you get into trouble you're already here so... Hey your boots match the detention chair.

Alex

Yeah, there use to be two chairs. (sits on the detention chair the same time as Harper)

Alex

Wait, wait, wait! We've heard two different stories here.

Harper

Well, maybe Warren is lying. Let's see if he can stand up to one of my uncomfortable stares.

Justin

[shudders]

Harper

Yep, he's a liar.

Alex

Quick! Quick! He fainted. Someone give me a pen. I love drawing mustaches on people who can't stop me!

Justin

Uh, now it makes sense, he won and a disgruntled family member is trying to wreck it for him. I've seen my future in the present.

Alex

Stevie is my friend. I'm sure she's got a reasonable explanation for what's going on.

Alex

Everyone is innocent until proven guilty.

Justin

C'mon Harper, let's go find Stevie. [starts to walk away with Harper]

Alex

I bet you he has a pen on him! [searches Warren]

Justin

[goes back to Alex and drags her away] Alex, stop that! It looks illegal.