MMailman
[the door comes to life with an eyeball and fangs] Nice try, Door Monster!
DMDoor Monster
[groans] I have got to change my name.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
OLOompa Loompa Singers
Oompa Loompa & Golden are simply the best!
MMagneto
[the host's microphone sticks to his body] Well, what'd you expect? It's Cheaters Week!
CBCharlie Brown
Hi, welcome back to iCharlie! Now it's time for nunchuck-demonstration!
[falls, gets dizzy and collapses]
[last lines]
GGirl
[surrounded by the Power Seesaw] But I'm tired!
BBoy
Keep going!
AAnnouncer
Hobbit Trails, just like prison with a giant water bottle!
I, C, A, F, 14.
EDEye Doctor
What are you, blind?
No, "I see an F-14"! (eye doctor sees an F-14, screams, F-14 crashes into it) So, no need for glasses; right?
AAnnouncer
King Tuttowski: It's time to skate like an Egyptian!
AAquaman
I'm going to go back into the desert! (runs off, ends segment)
GGuy
[during countdown] Uh, I'm looking for Parking Level 4. Did I get on the wrong elevator? [a lion attacks him]
EEvergreen
Hey, I use a bow and arrow too!
MMerida
Cool! [Evergreen punches her in the face]
EEgyptian
Why do we bury all that food?
PPitcher
Did you know that French toast bread is called "challah"? [runs off]
HHulk
[attacking Joss Whedon] Give Firefly only one season!
ENEdward Norton
Wait, this movie's over? Hulk's hardly in it! [turns green and transforms into the Hulk] Hulk want more screen time! [crashes into the screen, statics and ends segment]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.