DCDoctor Crocktopus/Crocker
[imprisoned in the Nega Chin's lair] This is a very depressing room. No sunlight, no hope... I should teach kids in here!
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
CCDr. Crocktopus/Crocker
IT'S THE NEGA CHIN! THE CRIMSON CHIN'S ARCHENEMY!
BSBaby Shredder/Vicky
How did you know that?
CCDr. Crocktopus/Crocker
I've confiscated a lot of comic books in my time.
[In a show parodying Speed Racer]
ATAdult Timmy
Hand me the Remote!
[extremely fast in a parody of bad anime dubbing] Why should I trust you? You're an adult! And if you're an adult that means you're not a child, and if you are not a child that means you're an adult, and if you're an adult that means you can be trusted! [Parody of Speed Racer's rapid frame changing] Aah! Ooh! Aah!
[In a show parodying Blue's Clues]
JJeff
Hi, kids! I'm Jeff! Ignore the shaving cut and the five o'clock shadow. I'm really a kid, just like you. Hey, let's go find some hints! Some Clint's Hints! Come on!
[In a show parodying Sesame Street]
I've never felt more alive! Get it? Felt! FELT!
ATAdult Timmy
[about to fade away] It's up to you. You can stop Vicky in "Maho Mushi". You can... change the future.
But if I do, you won't exist!
ATAdult Timmy
Sure I will. And I'll exist in a future worth getting into. You can do it, Timmy. You're a great kid. I know.
[He fades away]
No, come back! Please! Please! [screams] Every time something cool happens in my life- Every Time, Vicky ruins it! Well, I'm not gonna let her ruin anything else!
[The Turners confront Vicky after finally figuring out she's evil]
So Vicky, what do you have to say for yourself?
In the face of this overwhelming evidence that you are, and always have been, an evil, lying, troublemaking shrew!
[in tears] I'm, I'm sorry! I blame television!
Nice try! What do you take us for, idiots?
Yes?
Vicky, you're fired!
[to Mr. Burkenbakke] Mr. Burkenbakke? What are you doing with this garage sale? There's no garage.
BMr. Burkenbakke
Of course not. I'm a teacher. I can't afford a garage. It's a "I Don't Have a Garage" garage sale. I don't make "Crocker" money.
[reading a sign] Make Smoof, Not War? What's "smoof"?
BMr. Burkenbakke
Only the most naturally recurring material on Earth, little dude.
How come I've never heard of it?
BMr. Burkenbakke
Because, "the man" doesn't want you to.
[appears after Timmy rubs his lamp] Whoa, man! That was some party. Hey! This isn't Marlo's house; and these aren't my pants.
Hey, you're a genie!
Well, I guess we can cut brains off the wish list. Okay, kid here's the deal: I am Norm. I'm a magical genie, and- [Timmy, Cosmo and Wanda walk away] -hey! Wait up! [poofs back in front of Timmy] What's the big ten-year old hurry? What, are you late for a wedgie? Don't ya get it, for freeing me from the lamp, you get three wishes so- [Timmy and his fairies walk away again; and Norm poofs back up in front of Timmy] Hey! Smoof for brains! What part of three wishes do you not understand?
Timmy doesn't need you. He has fairy godparents. [Cosmo and Wanda's hair gets tangled]
The swirl is dangerous!
[chuckling] Fairy Godparents? [sarcastically] Oh, yeah, they're useful.
[in front of Trixie Tang's house] Time to get what I've always wanted; Trixie Tang's love.
Timmy, this is going to end badly.
I'll just be more specific: I wish Trixie Tang loved Timmy Turner.
Whatever you say. [puts wish in action]
TTTrixie Tang
[lovestruck] I love Timmy Turner. I love Timmy Turner.
Excellent! [a boy walks up to Trixie] Not excellent! Who's that?
That? That's Timmy J. Turner, of Penouscha, Wisconsin. [Trixie kisses the boy, and he faints, awestruck; as Trixie floats another boy] That's Timmy K. Timmy, El Sadungo, California. [Trixie kisses the boy and he also faints; as Trixie then floats to a old man] Timothy T. Turner, of Plattsburgh, Georgia...
TTTimothy T. Turner
[Trixie gives him a peck kiss of affection] Oh-ho, you are sweet!
You know what they all have in common? They're all smarter than you! [laughs] You think this is fun? I think so.
You're going back in the lamp.
[to Norm] You tricked me!
How could I trick you? I mean, you're ten years old and I'm fifty thousand. And with those teeth. I mean look at the size of those things! Hey, there's something you could've wished for: human-sized teeth.
[trapped inside a vacuum] I can't get out! Darn it! This bag is made out of smoof, isn't it? There are three things I can't escape from: magic lamps, the charms of Barbara Eden, and smoof stuff!
PGPolice Guard
[handing Uncle Albert a package] Package, Uncle Albert.
AUncle Albert
Splendid! Put it by the other ones, eh? [sets down Norm's lava lamp] Ah, another lamp for my collection. I can't wait to rub it... [Norm smirks triumphantly] ...as soon as they let me out of this straightjacket!
PGPolice Guard
[to another guard] Poor sap. He thinks genies really exist.
GGuard
Loony, eh?
AUncle Albert
Ah-hahahaha! GENIES!
[in defeat] Aw, smoof!
[as the Pixies are driving along in the desert in a car] Well, HP, it seems like another thirty-seven year plan to take over Fairy World has failed.
Yes, Sanderson. It seems like as long as there are fairies on Earth, we will never get the upper hand.
I can't believe they're making us drive home this time.
FBFlappy Bob's Father
[thinking their circus train is about to crash] I knew I should've finished law school!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.