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S1 E15

Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15

“Unfinished Business” quotes from Criminal Minds

74,544 quotes · page 257 of 4970

“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15

In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)

All right, Mr. Maellard gets back from vacation today, so I need you guys to clean the limousine.

Why don't we just wait till it rains? That's how I clean myself.

[beat] I want it looking as good as new when he comes back this afternoon. That means washed, waxed and detailed, got it?

Yeah, yeah, we got it.

So where are the keys?

Oh, you mean these keys?

Yeah.

Oh, no. I'll be holding on to these.

Aw, what? How're we gonna listen to the radio then?

Your job isn't listening to the radio, it's to clean the car. Do it before Mr. Maellard gets Back or you're fired! (leaves)

Great, no radio. This is gonna be so BOORRIIIIING!!!

Uh... (Margaret turns) Nothing. Sorry. See you.

(sighs)

(without hesistation, she kisses him)

See you soon.

Uh...bye. :(leaves, starts dancing, then sees Benson's car being towed)

Wait, are you sure you want to give me a ride and not because you bet someone you could or-

What? (scoffs) Come on, when have I- (points at Rigby, when he's trying to speak) Be quiet!

[In the kitchen; Muscle Man calls K.I.L.I.T. Radio on the phone]

PMPhone monitor

Hello, this is K.I.L.I.T Radio.

Yeah, I'd like DJ Donny G to play my...

PMPhone Monitor

To talk to a K.I.L.I.T representative, press 0. (Muscle Man presses 0) Are you calling in regard to a song you heard?

No, I wanna talk to somebody! (presses 0 several times) ZERO! ZERO! ZERO!

PMPhone Monitor

I'm transferring you to our bilingual system.

NO! (Presses 0 Again) ZERO! ZERO! ZERO!

SLSpanish/Latin phone monitor

Hola. llamas la Radio K.I.L.I.T.

(moves table & chair and groans) I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE SAYING!!!! (hits phone madly on the table, screaming in anger, Then Mordecai & Rigby come to Muscle Man)

Dude, Muscle Man, calm down!

UUUUGHH!!! I'm a failiure of a boyfriend! I can't even do something special for my girl!

Why don't we just go down to the radio station and find somebody to talk to?

Yeah, maybe someone there can help you.

You're right, bros. I need to take this to the source.

Well, that was easy!

Yeah, we totally got the hook up from Donny G! Man, I can't wait to see Starla's face tonight. She's gonna be really appreciative. (Sees Donny G throw away the tape in his rearview mirror) [Gasps] OH NO BRO!

(Muscle Man gets out of the car,slamming the door behind him)

YO DONNY! (Closes car door and begins running towards Donny G) DONNY G!!!

DGDonny G

Look man, it's not what you think.

It is what I think! Cause I saw you! I used to think that you were cool! You know something, I see D-player could do your job! But you know what, I still have a voice. (Takes the tape out of the trash can) And this voice, on this tape won't be silenced on YOU!

DGDonny G

Shh, shh, shh.

I SAID I WON'T BE SILENCED!

DGDonny G

Okay, okay. (glances at the security cameras warily) But, we can't talk here.

Skips! Test your strength, bro! [his hair becomes dark and wiggly] Ring the bell, Skips! [raises and offers him the mallet] Ring the bell!

[After Thomas drank the Cool Cubed slushy in a Big Swig size cup and got a brain freeze, Dr. Henry arrives and he checks inside Thomas's ear]

HDr. Henry

Hmm. So, he drank a slushy, you said.

Yeah.

HDr. Henry

Did you make him drink it?

Uh, maybe? [Dr. Henry glares sternly at him] Yeah, we did.

HDr. Henry

May I see the cup?

[Rigby gives him the cup. He checks it. Shaking his head, he makes a "tsk" sound]

HDr. Henry

Cool Cubed, Big Swig size, huh? This is quite a pickle. Well, I got some good news and bad news. (What do you wanna hear first?) (Rigby: Maybe the good news.) The good news is the core of Thomas's brain isn't completely frozen yet which means there's still a chance to thaw it out.

OK. What's the bad news?

HDr. Henry

The bad news is the Cool Cubed slushy is still very active. It's working its way into the brain core as we speak. If it gets there (and freezes it), Thomas's brain will stay frozen FOREVER!!!!

[Mordecai, Rigby and Pops gasp in shock]

What do we do?!

HDr. Henry

It's simple. I just shrink into little tiny people, then you go inside Thomas and stop the Cool Cubed slushy before it reaches the core. It's a dangerous procedure, but it's the only way to save him. Any volunteers?

Well, you and Pops have fun. [Mordecai annoyingly punches him]

No, dude, we got Thomas into this mess, so we're gonna go into Thomas and get that mess outta him! I think.

[notices a bowl containing an unknown substance] Dude, Muscle Man, what is that?!

Well, it used to be a bowl of chili. Now it's more of a house plant. [gets all unimpressed looks from the others; ashamed] Now you know how I live.

Everybody here?

Everybody except Fives.

Yeah, we should wait.

No time. Now you dudes should know this is gonna be dangerous. Ya wanna bail, I'll understand. [Thomas raises his hand] Yeah, Thomas?

Are we getting overtime for this?

NO!

Dude, it's not about overtime.

Mordecai, where are we? (Mordecai walks up to her.)

Right where I wanna be.

GFGuardian of the Friend Zone

Mordecai, Margaret, I now pronounce you out of the friend zone!

Hey, are you doing anything tomorrow? My family is having a barbecue. Wanna come?

Family function?! Pass. I can't stand my own family barbecues, Why would I want to go to someone else's?

[elbows Rigby] She's not talking to you!

Um. So, how 'bout it? Hehe.

Sure. Sounds like fun.

Awesome! I'm really excited for you to meet everybody, especially my dad. I think you'll really like him. He pilots the traffic Helicopter for the local news.

What?!

Whoa! Your dad is Chopper Six?!

That dude rules! [imitates Chopper Six] This is Chopper Six now flying over a ton of traffic. Bet all of you losers wish you were in this Chopper! WHOO! And then he flies over some burning truck in a fifty car pile up! So cool.

He is really cool, but don't let your guard down. Margaret's dad can be a pretty aggressive guy. It's common in such a male dominant profession. He even refuses to shake hands with any guy Margaret brings home.

Oh, come on! He's not that tough. He's super sweet when you get to know him.

Yeah. I'm sure we'll get along fine.

Well, we gotta get back to work. I'll pick you up tomorrow, okay? [she and Eileen leave]

Later.

Great. See ya. I have to shake that guy's hand.

What, why?

Dude, it's a huge deal! I'm finally out of the friend zone, and now she's taking me to meet her parents.

So what? You wanna date Margaret, not her dad.

You don't get it, dude. If Margaret and I are gonna date, I need her dad to like me. [determined] I have to get that handshake.

DDenise

Mordecai, let me introduce you to the family. We have Margaret's cousins-- Ricky, Tommy, Marcie, Robby, Ronnie, Susie, Stacey, you know John.

JJohn

Sup, Mordo.

DDenise

Uncle Tim, Uncle Dave, Uncle Bill, Aunt Theresa, Aunt Mary Beth, Aunt Kathleen, Nana Smith, Grandpappy Jack, and over by the grill is Margaret's--

Daddy!

FFrank

Is that my little hug-bug? Give me a hug, hug-bug!

[excitedly hugs her dad] Daddy!

FFrank

Aw, look at you so grown up. How am I gonna hug my hug-bug if I can't even recognize her?

Dad, I was here last weekend!

Okay, I'm tired of asking questions. So you're gonna tell me what's going on. Thomas, I know you know.

Huh? What?

I suggest you spill it!

Alright everybody, settle down!

Well, look who decided to chime in.

Okay, I'm gonna tell you what's going on, but you're not gonna like it!

WHAT!?!?

[to Mordecai and Rigby] Why didn't you tell me the country club stole the cart?!

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