Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
See that loser? That's Kevin. He's the neighborhood dork. I have to slap him around every now and then, just to remind him who's boss.
Eddy.
Neighborhood dork, huh? Hey, Double Dweeb, you getting this?
He collects underwear and gives it to the poor. Pretty stupid, huh bro? Slow down, Kevin, I was just kidding, stop, please!
Hello, my name is Ed.
We're running out of ideas, Double D. Think of something that'll make me look good.
Ed, you be careful with that! Oh, what do I care, it's his camera.
Man the helms! Dive! Dive! [swallows the camera]
Ed, what have you done? Open it. Open it. You should know better than to eat the camera. Just think what it will do to your digestive tract.
Boy, I can't wait to see that part, Double D.
Yes, well, let's not say we did, Ed.
C'mon, c'mon. I've got an impression to make, remember?
Give me the cash.
Eddy, taking note is a essential part of learning.
Are you touching my face?
Oh, uh, yes, sorry.
I just learned something today, Double D.
You have? Tell me, Eddy.
We should open up a weight loss clinic! I'll be rich!
Why is the Lady of Liberty looming over the cul-de-sac?
Eh, good riddance. Violins are for sissies. Why if I played an instrument, I get something manly, like a kazoo or something.
You've got a great personality. Besides, who needs good looks when you've got us?
[When Edd removes a plaster from Ed's back]
Is that a cookie?
Yep. [eats it] Saved it.
THAT IS THE MOST DISGUSTING, IRRATIONAL...It's nice to have you back, Ed.
See? That's my lucky quarter, Sarah.
Get away from there! This time, Rolf will be serious.
It's mine! I found the quarter!
Save your breath, losers. That's my quarter.
Take a hike! Jimmy found that quarter first.
I found this shoe! Shoes for the taking, Double D!
Hands off my quarter!
Your attention please! People! I may have a solution to everyone's dilemma!
Hey everybody, let's be nice. Shush. Double D's got something to-
May the onion of agony soil your macaroon! [Kevin cracks his back] Rolf's back. It has been healed. Thank you, Kevin, but you are a nincompoop, as the coin is mine! Bugaboo!
Hey, lay off, it's mine! [Edd sounds an airhorn] Dude.
What are you trying to do, blow our heads off?!
Crude, yet effective.
If you smelt it, you dealt it, Eddy.
What can you do, if you live in a shoe, and you ain't got no sole?
I almost up-chucked.
[answers the phone] Talk to me. [whistles a bit] Trade it. Buy it. Sell it. [hangs up]
[jumping] Up! Up! Up!
Put some muscle into it, Ed!
You got it, chief. And UP! [leaps straight up into the sky] Eddy, I'm coming! [crashes through the desk] I'm okay.
The wooden board saved you from three evil witches and the creepy crawly? MAMA!!! THE FAIRY TALE THAT HAUNTS ROLF HAS COME TRUE!!!
[yelling] THAT'S IT! I've had it up to here WITH YOUR BAD MOOD! Crack a smile, bust a gut, BE HAPPY!!! [slaps Ed] Get over it.
[roars and rips his unibrow into two] BIIIIIG TROUBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLE!!!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
