How was the trench?
I had to wipe my arse with leaves. And I think there were some ants in there, so I now literally have ants in my pants. And soil, and some earwigs. (boys laugh)
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
[Peter has a ACME firework-type rocket strapped to his back. Brian is holding a lighter.]
Light it, Brian!
BBrian
Peter, I don't wanna do this.
Do it, Brian. It's the only way I'm gonna catch that bird.
Roadrunner [offscreen]: Meep-meep!
Here he comes! Light it!!
[After the Roadrunner zips by, Brian lights the rocket, sending Peter soaring through Cleveland's house, destroying it and revealing Cleveland in his second-floor bath tub and the now-overweighted Cleveland Jr. sitting on the second-floor toliet.]
No, no, no, no, no, noooo! [His tub crashes with him in it as Cleveland Junior closes his eyes to not watch but the toilet stays intact.] Doggone it! That's it! No more! I'm tired of being kicked around by this world!
Brian [offscreen]: I'm sorry, Cleveland.
It's all right.
BBrian
I tried to stop him...
I don't blame you, Brian! You a dog! A DOG!!
[Cleveland and Cleveland Jr. have left Quahog to mark the beginning of "The Cleveland Show"]
SStewie
What the hell? He's getting his show?
Well aren't we the Black Brady Bunch?
CCleveland
Except I'm not a gay architect, and my wife's not sleeping with my son!
[everyone laughs]
Not yet!
Great! Have fun, kids. Don’t drink too many sodas. Hahaha.
Ahhhh a Bear!
Ahhhh a Black Man! Yeah, doesn't feel so good, does it?
Oh I know y'all ain't leaving without making these beds.
[Cleveland is in his own Men's Warehouse commercial]
I'm gonna like the way I look...I guarantee it.
Hasta la possum, baby!
[as the group throws a joke at Cleveland Jr. as part of a comedy roast, to try and get him to cry] That's cruel without even knowing the reference.
[Federline Jones slaps Cleveland Jr.]
I may be a virgin, [angrily pulls on Federline's gold necklace] but I'll kick your ass if you do that again!
PPriest
All across this great land, teenagers are takin' a pledge: The Purity Pledge, to hand over their virginities to their fathers, the high priests of the home.
Hear that? I'm the high priest of our home. I would like roast beef for dinner.
Shut the hell up!
[grabs Federline's hat and hits him with it] BAD HORMONE-RIDDEN ADOLESCENT! BAD, BAD, BAD!
Last minute check: any chives in my teeth? [he shows his teeth, which are covered with green leafs]
They're all over! What were you eating?!
Chives.
AMAuntie Momma
And now that my work here is done, I better leave before I turn into a blumpkin.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.