Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
They're sleeping?
Um, yeah yeah. You bet.
Thank's again for helping.
Oh hey, these are my grandchildren. They are my blood.
Okay, I'd better go.
Okay, we'll talk later.
(Hangs up the phone before she realize about the letter in the table. As she open it, it's shown that Sheldon is telling him about their runaway).
Son of a bitch. I hate those kids.
Dang it.
Are you aiming for them?
Everybody just shut up. I got this.
[The three of them then realize about a siren wailing behind their car.]
Oh, no. We're going to jail.
Georgie's going to jail. I'm saying I was kidnapped
That's a good plan. You and I were kidnapped.
If I'm going to jail, we're all going to jail.
Oh, you'd better pull over.
[As Georgie pull over, it's revealed that the siren was coming from a ambulance.]
Oh, thank god.
Well, don't just sit there. Follow it.
Why?
It's an ambulance. It's going to the hospital.
Hang on.
How about i put the radio on real low.
Shut up.
[The end credits scroll up. The logo reads: Chuck Lorre Productions, #570]
Believe me.
[final lines]
Fun fact: The first time I almost died was at the age of nine. The murder weapon: A Jimmy Dean sausage.
[In the flashback, Sheldon chokes and clutches his throat, his blue eyes wide with distress]
Mom, Sheldon's making faces at me.
[Mary sees Sheldon clutching his throat and struggling to breathe]
Sheldon?! Honey!
In fairness to Mr. Dean, this one morning I decided to forego my normal twenty chews per bite, as prescribed by the American Medical Association.
George, help!
[bending Sheldon over his knee] Come here, boy. We got it. We just got to smack it out. [He smacks Sheldon on the back]
To further complicate matters, in any real life crisis, my family's default mode is mindless panic.
[from the comfort of the breakfast table] Sheldon's gonna die! Sheldon's gonna die!
Or heartless apathy.
[Georgie bites into a slice of toast and watches. George picks Sheldon up by his legs and shakes him]
Here we go. This is how you do it. Here we go. And shake.
It's interesting, the things you think about when life is ebbing from your body. For instance, linoleum. What is it, really? Plastic? And if so, how is it from Formica?
I'm calling 911.
[While being shaken, Sheldon's gaze turns to the cereal box on the table]
And what about Count Chocula? How is he a count? Did the title come with land?
George, Heimlich! [George puts the boy on his feet and does a heimlich maneuver] Don't hurt his little ribs!
They say in the final moments, your life passes before your eyes. All I saw was my brother licking jelly off the knife, and putting it back in the jar.
[Sheldon's windpipe is freed from obstruction]
Okay, it's better now. Sheldon! Honey, are you okay? Can you breathe? Say something!
You have to... throw away... that jelly!
Booyah!
The math says they should never punt again.
Who's his real daddy?
The cheerleader hugged me to her bosom.
That's amazing!
No more high fives. I can't keep washing my hands.
[screaming, while the boys at the party are holding him up in the air, mosh style] PUT ME DOWN! I SAID, "PUT ME DOWN"! PUT ME DOWN, I'M NOT ENJOYING IT!
GEORGIE, *TURN THAT DOWN!*
What?!
[?] ?
I'll get to it later.
?
I don't feel like it.
[?] Random
My room bothers you so much, you clean it.
[pause; ?] That's...it! You're grounded! Do you hear me?!
You know, sometimes you sound like a super villain.
[excitedly high-pitched] Silence!
That'll be more effective after your voice changes.
[Tam steps away. Sheldon sighs]
[deep voice]
Silence!
I can't die. I've only kissed one boy.
What?
Don't worry, it was years ago.
I'm bored.
Hey! Someday, someone will write a book about Sheldon. Don't you want a chapter in there about how loving and supportive you were?
What's the point? I ain't never gonna read it.
Dad, can we afford a computer?
You do my taxes. What do you think?
[pause] Nevermind.
Here we go. Fifteen years and fourteen hours later, the best brisket in Texas.
[tastes some]
Connie, you evil bitch!
Back home, he applied the spice rub with such erotic tenderness it made my mother a little jealous.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
