[Harold has begun to hug her] Get off of me, you big whale!
Ow.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
Everything that happened today was your fault. You can't do anything right! Can't you? Take the bus for example. Why do you think we've missed it, Harold? Oh, let me see, hmm... maybe it was because you were too busy eating twice your body weight in Chocolate Num-Nums! Oh, how about this one? "Let's take the subway, I think it goes to Lincoln." Oh, wait, no, it doesn't, it goes straight to the bowels of the underworld! Population: homicidal, toothless, midget clowns! "I know, let's steal their bike, they won't mind." Now, you'd think that would be quite enough to fill any moron's day, but you are not just any moron, are you, Harold? You are the king! Your day's just getting started. So, because of your amazing curiosity about the world around us, you pulled the plug out of the bottom of our getaway boat! [sighs] You idiot...
So, is that what you really think of me, Helga? Do you think I'm an idiot who can't do anything right?
Yes, Harold, that's what I really think.
CGCouncilman Gladhand
He's just a butcher. He's talking about meat!
[trying to cheer Arnold up] We'll grow old together... Oh, wait a minute, I'm already old! Well, okay, so you'll grow old alone with no one to talk to and nothing to come to, except your fun memories and... [Arnold gets sad] ...me and... I'm not helping, am I?
TPTillie Plink
Dude, listen to Tillie,… [starts screaming out purism] Well, you want to buy a dog, sell a dog, it's uneasy! Like Tillie said, it's uneasy!!
SSimmons
PS 118 needs you back!
DDaizy
Y'need to wait, Simmons! Don't try to fret over it!
Excuse me a moment. [closes door, starts singing and dancing with a doll] They want me back! They want me back! They want me back! Who-ho! [opens the door, gets serious face] Please come in if you can.
From now on, it's not all gonna be about me. Could you get the door?
Opening.
It's gonna be about me and you. As far as doing favors for each other, it's going to be Even Steven. Snag me one of those fruit cups.
Snagging.
From now on, everything is going to be much better. You'll see! No, not L, Phoebe. B, B, B.
Repressing.
[when he saw a D+ on his paper] Oh, I hate school. I wish I never had to go to school again.
Come on, Harold, it's not that bad.
Yes it is! We're trapped in here day after day doing boring stuff and standing in line for cold, crappy food that they don't even give me time to eat! Oh, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it! I just wish there was some way to get out of school, and to get to stay home, and to be free!
What the devil's going on?!
Woohoo! I'm a fireman! Oops!
Wolfgang, that is a flagrant violation of school safety rules not to mention federal law, you are suspended!
What?!
You heard me. You are hereby ordered to stay out of the school for one entire week!
Yes? Oh. Thank you, Harold. You’re right, I should have this fire extinguisher refilled immediately. It’s not safe, otherwise. Thank you, though. Now run along to your class.
Hey! That stupid dork was supposed to suspend me!
[he heard Harold; walks out of his office; offended] Harold, did you just call me a stupid dork?
No, no, no, no! [realizes he could be suspended for doing that] I mean yes. Yes, I did call you a stupid dork!
That's a violation against the school constitution, Article 34, Section C, Paragraph 2. You're suspended.
YES! I mean- awww, gee...
Harold, you are not supposed to be within a hundred yards of school property.
But, Principal Wartz...
Uh, sorry, Harold. But the school constitution demands that I give you another week of suspension.
Another week? No, please!
Rules are rules, I'm afraid. Now, promise me, Harold, that you won't let me catch you on the premises again.
I promise, Principal Wartz. I won't go on the premises again.
Yes, can I help you?
Someone ordered a pizza for the Teacher's Lounge?
What are you doing here, Harold?
[in a fake Italian accent] I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not Harold, I'm a little old Italian man delivering a pizza. See? I-I even have a mustache. [Wartz takes the mustache off of Harold] OW!
That's another week's suspension for you, young man.
Awwwww...
Repeat slowly after me.
Slowly after me.
No. Not yet. Alright, now! "I will not enter the school grounds for the next three weeks."
I will not enter the school grounds for the next three weeks.
Good, I'll see you in three weeks.
Good, I'll see you in three weeks.
Harold?
Harold.
D'oh!
I’ll be on school grounds in no time. What a great plan!
Hello, Son. You're digging quite a hole there, aren't you?
Yeah. See, I got suspended because I called the Principal a stupid dork. [grunts as he shovels some dirt] And now he won't let me into the school, [grunts as he shovels more dirt] so I'm gonna tunnel in.
Is that so? That's another week's suspension for you, Mr. Berman.
Awwwww... [the shovel drops on his foot] OW!
And fill up that hole.
[Arnold and Harold approach]
What the devil's wrong with you two? You are not supposed to be within a hundred yards of this school!
With all due respect, sir, according to the school constitution, article 14, section 2, paragraph 5, we are fully within our rights.
And it says here in, uh, Article 39, Section 4, when a student gets suspended, he can repeal it if there are... outside circumcisions!
[Correcting Harold] ...stances.
...stances! Right. Outside circumstances!
And we have here 40 pages of the material explaining why we have the rights to be back into school. Under article 39, we would like a review of our case by an outside agency.
You boys make a very impressive case. The only problem is that you are talking about an outdated school constitution from 1956. This is the current constitution, and there is nothing in here about any appeals, that's for sure.
[After Principal Wartz lifts Harold's suspension]
Thank you, Principal Wartz. [Starts to follow Harold into the school]
Wait a minute, where are you going? [Arnold stops]
Huh?
I didn't say anything about lifting your suspension.
But Principal Wartz, I...
Just kidding. Now run along, young one! Ah, Wartzy, you've done it again. The true principal must temper justice with mercy. It's no wonder the children love and respect me.
Hey, Wartz, ya wide load! Ha ha!
That's it, young man. You are suspended!
You can't suspend me! I'm already suspended!
Well, in that case, you are unsuspended! So get back to class.
Gotta catch me first, old ugly guy! Ha ha! Ha ha!
Come back here, pal! [Principal Wartz furiously chases Wolfgang as he falls in the hole] Whoa! HAROLD?!
Uh-oh. I sense another one of your oh-so-painfully illuminating boyhood problems. Fess up, Arnold.
It's just that Parents' Tournament Weekend is for kids and their parents, and you and Grandma are great and everything, but you're not actually my parents. I-I don't know if we belong there.
GGertie
[sympathetically] Oh, Arnold.
Anyway, I think I'm too full for dessert. [leaves] Good night.
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