Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
Tom, you're in charge of music.
Aww man. Well alright.
Aww did you wanna DJ little puppy? I didn't know that little puppies could operate an ipod with their little puppy paws.
Ewww. And Booo. This kind of thing is getting out of hand with you two. Ya'll are an official warning.
Wow! Are those Jens Trauder Colored Tabs!? I thought those were discontinued.
They were. I had to order them through some Mexican back channels.
Juan Julio Officina Supplies!? I thought they went out of business!
They did but they opened up a new one in Oxaca.
...What is happening right now?
Fine. I'll go with you because Leslie's making us and we live together and we only have one car right now because you laked mine.
What does laked mean?
I tried to jump it over a lake! Why don't you stay out of our conversations Larry!
Will do! [chuckles and walks off]
We here at the Parks Department have something called the "April Ludgate Summer Solstice Druid Festival and Buffalo Wings Eating Contest" ...I don't know why I let her name it. It's basically a summer internship program.
What brings you to the festering putrid stink hole on the armpit of freedom?
...
That's what he calls City Hall.
Leslie was just telling me about your summer internship and I was thinking about taking it.
[laughing] Oh no no no no! No! I respect your father too much to let his daughter work for free for the government. Why don't you get a paying job for the summer?
Why don't you shut your mustache!?
...
Sorry.
My Prom was right after I got impeached so I couldn't leave the house without being egged. But my parents threw me a Prom in our living room...I think I'm still messed up from it.
[in a squeaky helium voice] I know what you're doing Ron and I will defeat you! Mark my words!
Stop wasting helium. It is intended for welding and filling airships.
I attended Prom with Susan Hoffler. I picked her up in my truck, we slow danced to a Merle Haggard song, and then I left early to go to my shift at the quarry. I was twelve years old. Never went again. Felt like I had outgrown it.
Look around. The bloom of youth. Like flowers on the sunset of an eagle's poetry.
Andy. I hate teenagers!
If you give this a chance, you're gonna love it. I promise. It's like the movie Expendables 2. First time, hated it. Second time, hated it. Third time, it was okay. Then the fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, tenth time I watched it, I realized something. It's just it's not good. It's not a good movie. Now that I've convinced you, why don't we go dance?
So have you ever pulled a ceremonial chord before? There's a little trick to it. You wanna hold it not too tight, sort of like a firm handshake, and then move towards the ground in a rope-pulling motion.
So just...pull the rope.
That's right!
I didn't go to my Prom. I was dating an older man at the time. Like I'm gonna dance with a bunch of kids while he's coaching Duke to the final four.
I just wanna go home but I feel bad because Andy's having such a good time.
[view of Andy having a dance off and having a great time]
How can I love someone when I hate everything he loves?
That's not true. He loves a lot of dumb stuff but he loves you the most. If something's bothering you, just tell him. It's always better to be direct.
[guy walks up to Donna]
Hey girl. Are you ready to go?
I feel like I told you to wait in the car.
...Yeah. [walks off]
See? Be direct.
Sorry children. Forget that this happened. Continue with your awkward, close quarters gyrating.
[Ron starts rushing Leslie off the stage]
And if this is the evening you decide to have sex use protection please!
Where'd you get that dress?
I was buried in it.
... [awkwardly walks away]
You may be old, but you'll never be as old as me.
Yeah. You're old as shit! Thanks Ben.
Glad I could help.
Oh, let me introduce you to my boyfriend.
[Greg Pikitis walks up and puts his arm around Allison]
[shocked] ...Greg Pikitis?
What up Knope!?
Hello Gregory.
You guys know each other?
You might say that.
Come on baby, let's get out of here.
[Greg and Allison walk away]
It's that horrible kid who used to prank us all the time right?
Offer's off the table. She's a terrible person with terrible judgement.
[Leslie tries to walk away and causes a huge mess due to Greg secretly stapling her dress to a tablecloth]
PIKITIS!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
