Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
[Lincoln gives his parents the first picture where his sisters are being themselves]
Lincoln, you bonehead! You gave them the wrong picture!
Yep! I knew you'd blow this, too.
No, I gave them the right one. The one that shows the real you. The perfect you.
[embrace Lincoln] Aw! Thank you, Lincoln!
"Come on, guys. We'll just find another pool."
"Actually, we've been suspended from every aquatic recreation center within a 60-mile radius."
[The gang stops and groans in agony]
"Seriously? How are we gonna keep cool now?"
[The sister start complaining that they're banned from every pool in town.]
"So that's it, then. No more pool for the Louds." [He gets an idea.] "That's it! Pool for the Louds! Why didn't I think of that sooner?"
[Heads off while the sisters continue complaining.]
Maybe not so perfect. [puts it back and finds an individual one] Oh! Paradise for One. Just imagine... [imagines himself in a pool on a small island in the middle of the ocean] Now this is a pool I can really get into. [heads for the exit] Lincoln's little baby loves shortenin', short- [triggers the alarm] Oops. Gotta pay first.
[At the Loud House, the sisters are trying to cool off with the contents from the freezer. Lincoln tries to hide his pool kit.]
"Hey, Linc! Wanna chill with us?"
"CHILL! Good one, Leni!" [giggles]
"Good what?"
"Thanks, but I don't mind the heat." [The sisters are confused] "But, uh, you guys keep cool in here. Definitely no reason to go outside. I wouldn't even bother looking out there. Am I talking too much? I feel like I'm talking too much." [Leaves]
"He's clearing suffering the first symptoms of heat stroke. Now, pass the frozen succotash."
[Lynn tosses her the succotash. Lincoln sneaks in the backyard while the sisters are cooling off.]
"Scoot over. You're melting the broccoli."
"Well, stop breathing on the frozen carrots!"
"Hey, Lynn, can you grab that bag of peas? PEAS and thank you!" [giggles while her siblings groan]
[Breathing heavily] "Whew!"
[Lisa pours the serum anyway and the water evaporates, it turns into pink smoke; It's revealed that the older sisters have tinkled in the pool. They blush except Lisa and Lincoln.]
"Hmm... Unprecedented levels."
[Lincoln washes the pool and refills it while his sisters watch and the party continues; Luan and Leni are playing Marco Polo]
"MARCO!"
"MARCO!"
"No, Leni. I'm Marco. You're Polo."
"Really, who's Leni?"
[Lily is about to go skinny dipping again]
"Oh no no no no no!" [grabs her and puts her in a diaper.] "No fecal incidents in my pool! I'm watching you, Lily." [sees Lucy floating] "Lucy? I didn't know you liked to swim."
"I'm not swimming. I'm trying to see if I'm a witch. Am I floating?"
"Yes."
"Wicked."
[chases Lily] "Get back here!"
"You know what your soup needs? NOODLES!" [Bonks Lana with a pool noodle]
[Grabs one] "Bring it!"
"STOP SPLASHING ME!!!"
"Guys, no horseplay!"
"What about elephant play?" [blasts Lincoln with a jet of water while sounding like an elephant, which makes Lana, Lynn, and Lola laugh at Lincoln.]
[flies right into Bobby] "Huh? Bobby? What're you doing here?"
"Lori said there was an opening for a lifeguard at Casa Loud." [Blows whistle] "Everyone out! Senior swim!"
"What? There aren't any old people here!"
[The sisters and Bobby are hanging out front with the Delux swimming pool Lincoln originally planned to get. Luna is playing a steel drum. Lori is taking pictures of her darling lifeguard.]
"Oh, that's fierce, babe."
"En garde!"
[knocks Lynn in the water] "Have at thee! HA!"
"Just because I'm fabulous doesn't mean I can't have fun!" [slides down and swims] "La-la-la, la-la-la!"
[Lucy and Lily apply sunscreen on each other. Leni and Luan play Marco Polo again.]
"Okay, this time, instead of Marco Polo, why don't we just use our REAL names?"
"Okay! So I'm..." [looks at her brother, surprised] "Lincoln?"
"Boy, you really don't get this game at all, do ya?" [Notices what Leni meant] "Oh! Hey, Linc!"
[The sisters look happy to see him.]
[Aware of what's going on] "Hey, guys...what's all this?"
"Well, little bro, you had such a good idea in buying YOUR pool, we decided to-"
"-POOL our money to get this one!!!" [Giggles and everyone groans. Luan gets bonked by Lynn's noodle] "That's using your noodle!!" [Giggles some more] "Ow!"
"Aren't you gonna get in? There's TOTES room for one more!"
"You're gonna let me use your pool?" [The sisters are concerned] "Even though I kicked you out of mine?"
"Well, he was kind of a meanie."
"Not to mention selfish."
"And bossy."
"And he stole my whistle!"
"But that doesn't mean he can't use our pool."
"Give her back, Lori!"
"Why should you get her? I've literally been waiting 17 years for someone in this family who likes the things I like!"
[off-screen] "HELP!"
[Lincoln and Lori rush into Lily's bedroom where Leni is stuck in Lily's crib]
"Oh, thank goodness. I got in here to show Lily my fashion magazine, but now, I can't get out of this baby prison!" [cries]
[Lori and Lincoln help Leni out of Lily's crib]
"Upsy-daisy."
"There you go, Leni."
"Agoo!"
[Lily is having a tea party with Lola and Lana]
"More tea, Lady Lillington?" [Lily removes a tiara that Lola placed on her head]
She doesn't wanna have a dumb tea party. She wants to play with Izzy! [Puts Izzy on Lily's head. They then start to pull Lily by her arms, which discomforts her]
No, she doesn't!
Yes, she does!
No, she doesn't!
Yes, she does!
Dudes, give her back! We were in the middle of a jam sesh!
She was my specimen!
We were talking to Great-Grandma Harriet.
We were playing ball!
We were getting ready to take our show on the road!
We were gonna look at my magazines!
We were watching Dylan's date!
BT-dubs, Lori, Great-Grandma Harriet knows you re-gifted her brooch, and she is not happy about it. [Lori instantly looks regretful]
GIVE US BACK, LILY!
[The other girls fight over Lily until Lincoln comes in and grabs her]
WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?!
[Lincoln tries to escape with Lily, but Lori stops him dead in his tracks]
I'll take that. [grabs Lily and runs]
Oh, no, you don't! [gets Lily back from Lori but crashes into Luan who switched Lily out with Mr. Coconuts]
Whoops. Sorry, Linc! Sorry, you loser! [laughs but loses Lily to Leni]
Ha! Na-na-na, na-na-na! [loses Lily to Lisa while she's gloating at Luan] LILY'S INVISIBLE!
[offscreen] Boo. [Lisa screams and she takes Lily from her] Boo.
[Leni runs off screaming; Lisa gets Lily back from Lucy only for Leni to intercept her; Luan tosses a banana peel on the floor causing Leni to slip and drop Lily and Lincoln catches her; Lynn intercepts Lily; Lola comes driving in her princess car and runs over Lynn and takes Lily from her; Lana tosses her jacks on the floor and causes Lola to have a tire blow out; in slow motion, Lola goes crashing and Lana grabs Lily only for the other girls to catch up to her by blocking her path]
Dang it...
[They all start having another brawl until Lincoln whistles out to them and they stop]
Look! We all want Lily to be our mini-me, right? Well, there's only one way to settle this. We'll let Lily choose.
[Lynn farts under the covers] Ugh! Lynn!
[pulls the covers over Lincoln, causing him to gag] DUTCH OVEN! Goodnight, Lincoln.
Leni, why is this picture of Bobby hidden on your side of the closet?
Oh, there is it is! That was a surprise present from Bobby for your 88-day-iversary. He asked me to hide it for him, but I forgot where I put it.
That anniversary was eight days ago, and Bobby gave me socks! I can't believe this! You're literally seeing Bobby behind my back! You are no longer my sister!
[in a British accent] ALL I WANTED WAS A BLEEDING PILLOW MINT!
Luna?
What can I do? In a family this big, our eco-footprint is a size 18 triple wide. We use a lot of electricity, fossil fuels, water, aerosols, non-biodegradables, and did I mention electricity? We gotta reduce our eco-footprint. Hopefully, I can get my sisters on board. [cut to the living room, his sisters are complaining] Or not. Time to pull out the big guns. [holding up the poster] And if we don't all do our part, this adorable little guy won't survive. [they cry]
But what can we do?
I'm glad you asked!
Pee-yew. What stinks?
[Suddenly, the TV goes off and it's revealed that Lincoln's sisters have unplugged it and are wearing potato sacks over their bodies and bandages on their feet, with a huge stench coming out of them, and all look incredibly furious]
GAME OVER, LINCOLN!
It's not what it looks like! [notices the game controller and hides it behind his back]
We're up there making all these sacrifices, and you're down here playing some stupid computer game?!
Okay, so maybe it is what it looks like.
If you don't wanna give anything up, why should we?
But... but... polar bear? [holds up the poster]
[Lincoln's sisters are starting to feel remorse again, but this time, unfortunately, they snap out of it.]
Aww...wait a minute! You can't use that on us anymore!
Come on, girls! Let's go get our stuff back!
[holding up her glass of air] And a refill!
[They do so, and leave the basement.]
Let's all give Lincoln a round of applause for stepping up his green game and doing his part.
[The whole class cheers for Lincoln for saving the baby polar bear challenge]
Well, I saved the polar bear, and I'm not an outcast. Although, technically speaking... [literally outside the window, rubbing with a scented towelette] my social life is out the window. Do you mind?! I'm showering!
I've been thinking about what you said. And you and the girls are right. I do get a little crazy when it comes to first concerts.
Why are they so important to you?
[Flashback to a younger, unfamiliar Luna attending her first concert] Cause my first rock show changed my life. It was Mick Swagger. Summer of seventh grade. The Gimme Swelter Tour. Up until that muggy June night, I didn't know who I wanted to be, but the moment Mick and the boys took the stage, it all started to become clear. It was like he was talking to me. [as Mick Swagger sings, Luna comes up to the stage and transforms into her familiar appearance] It was in that moment I realized... I WAS LUNA LOUD! Stage dive!
Wow. I had no idea.
I know it's only rock and roll, but I like it.
[crying] I'm sorry. That was just such a beautiful story. You're right, kid. First concerts are unforgettable. And I can't let you miss yours. [lets them out] Here. Here's your tickets back. Now get outta here!
[singing] Backup, backup, backup!
No no no no. Leni, you don't actually sing the words "backup". You sing what's on the page.
Oh. Got it! [singing] What's on the page! What's on the page! What's on the page!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
