Chicago Fire quotes

Shay, this is that baby book I was telling you about. Lots of good stuff. Swaddling, soothing...

Thanks, Herrmann. Hey do you know if it says anything about sleep schedules?

[sheepishly] I didn't read it.

You're our guy for construction on the new bar right?

I believe the offer was "free consultation".

Mouch

There's a Japanese proverb, don't let your daughter-in-law each your autumn eggplants.

What the hell does that mean?

Mouch

Don't let yourself be taken advantage of.

Did you happen to notice if Cruz's gear had a cape sewn to it?

No, Chief. It definitely does not.

Then please dissuade your man of the notion that he is invincible.

What do you think is inside?

Nothing good. My luck don't run that way.

Otis

[excitedly] Let's open it and find out. Worst case scenario it's empty.

What if it contains a decomposed head of some gangster that went missing in the 20's? Next thing you know, this bar gets wrapped in crime scene tape and we can't get back in here!

Otis

If there's a mobster's head in there, my "Mustache Pete's" is gonna be famous.

We're not calling it Mustache Pete's.

Otis

Yes we are.

So, what exactly is our role in bomb squad assist?

Nothing. Not unless the bomb tech snips a wrong wire.

Mouch

Shoulda never opened the safe.

Shut it, Mouch.

Dawson, don't. It is a gateway to hell, I'm telling you. Besides, it's not even rightfully ours.

Mouch

Possession is nine-tenths of the law.

Shut it, Mouch.

Otis

[outside Herrmann's toilet stall] Herrmannnnn. [knocks] Herrmannnnn.

Are you kidding me?! Right now?

[after Severide refuses to give her a glass of wine] You suck!

Severide

You gotta get your oven ready for that bun, baby.

When I look around this room, I think of the importance of this institution has had on each and every firefighter here. The discipline, the tradition. It's what ties us all together, the young and the well-seasoned alike.

In light of recent events recent allegations, rather personnel division has flagged this house for sexual harassment sensitivity training.

Uh, Chief? I think actually it's sexual harassment and sensitivity training. 'Cause the way that you just said it, it makes it sound like we have to be sensitive toward sexual har–– [notices Boden's glare and stops rambling]

It reminds me of this joke my dad once told me. Why is Chicago style pizza so thick?

Why?

Don't worry about it.

Look, I know all this new political correctness-type deal is a head-spinner, 'cause it was a little more loosey-goosey back in the day. I mean, hell, when I first started working for the city you'd walk into some locker rooms, they'd have hustler centerfolds taped up. You do that nowadays, ninjas drop from the ceiling and will airlift your ass right out of there.

Who put dog food in there? [sees Hadley chuckling] That's funny to you?

Relax, mutt.

What did you say to me?!

Severide

Mutt? You out of your mind?

When I was a candidate over at 38, they put menthol in my underwear. What is the––

No, no, no, what you did was so far beyond that, that if you can't tell the difference you are dumber than you look. What I mean, this house was already under a microscope. You really couldn't put that together?