CMs. Chao
How did you find me here?
I'm a detective.
All S1
S1 E5Poem
Where were you ten minutes ago? I could've used your help.
Help? I don't feel as if I know you well enough.
What's with you? Do you want me to catch these freaks or not?
Of course. I want you to catch every last one. But I'm the Devil, old boy; I can't change my stripes.
[to Stone] Love? The most delicious emotion of all. Without love, you and I would be out of a job.
LLandlady
I want your badge number.
666.
S1 E8Ashes
[as Stone goes through someone's mailbox]
AAshe
Pardon me for interrupting you here, but that happens to be a federal crime. Is that within your jurisdiction, too?
I answer to a lower power.
You don't have any friends, Ezekiel. You're not only really dead, you're really most sincerely dead.
Isn't that from "The Wizard of Oz"?
I HATE that movie.
[about roses]
Did you know, the thorns were originally my idea?
You loved her, didn't you?
I never loved anyone but God, and that was a long time ago.
S1 E9Lovers
[Stone tries to convince the Devil to let him have a car]
It's not New York any more. Nobody wants to walk around here. Plus, the buses suck.
Now wait a minute. Fifteen years in Hell, now you're back on Earth and you're complaining. Oh, because you have to walk. You're not going Hollywood on me, are you, Zeke?
[after Stone has sent two souls back to hell]
Good work, Ezekiel. Two birds with one "Stone."
Why don't you try and just enjoy some of the beautiful things in this world? Just one. Try it on for size.
Believe me, it won't fit.
S1 E10Carrier
[Stone brushes his teeth]
Four out of five dentists surveyed agree, tooth decay is no longer a problem... once you're dead.
Please, Ezekiel. My job's not to decide who lives and dies. My business is with the soul. And I have never damned a soul who didn't thoroughly deserve it. Mother Nature is a completely different story. She kills indiscriminately, good and evil alike. Why she gets all the good press, I'll never know
S1 E11Faces
[Going through Stone's mail]
Junk mail, mostly. One of my lesser triumphs.
I have always advocated family values, all the way back to Cain and Abel.
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