Richie (being asked questions for a pointless questionnaire): Action!
Weight!
Richie (enraged): Weight?! What are you implying? I live on Sweetex! I'm still wearing the same pair of trousers I was when I was 17!
Only because you've sewn the living room curtains into the waistband.
I could still pass for 17!
Stones! Now wait!
No. I refuse to answer! This is an outrage!
No! Wait there, while I get another pen! This one's fucked!
Well, I didn't do it! Do I look like a biro molester?!
Richie, have you seen my felt tip?
Richie (frantically): No, Eddie, no, I've never seen your felt tip. No, I've only seen you naked once. I fell straight into a coma and had to go to therapy for six years. Every time I think of you naked, I've had to close my eyes when I walk past a butcher's window. I shall never eat tripe again!
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