Eddie and Richie in “Unfinished Business”

Hang on, hang on hang on hang on. I've got your real present here.

It's a piece of paper. It is a small piece of paper.

Read it.

"Madame Swish, 3:30." Oh! Eddie! You haven't? Oh, what a pal you are. "Madame Swish". Ooh-err! God, at last I'm really going to do it. And on my birthday as well! Oh, I wonder what she's like?

She's a dead cert mate, a real stayer.

Really?

Yeah, she'll come first.

What, before me? Good grief, that's quick. So she'll think I'm great! Oh, what a pal you are! And it's all paid for?

Um, not exactly. I need a tenner.

A tenner. Right. That's quite cheap, isn't it?

Er, well, no, in that case it's a tenner each way.

How many ways are there?

Well you'll come first, second or third?

Third? How many people are gonna be there?

Well, a few thousand.

What!

It's at Kempton.

Kempton?! I can't get all the way down to Kempton by 3:30!

You won't have to, mate. It'll be on the telly.

They're going to televise it? Well what if my auntie's watching?

Well what's illegal about betting on a horse?

A horse?! Madame Swish is, is a horse!

Yeah! What did you think it was?

Oh nothing. Just checking.

I have given you a red-hot tip.

I know and there's nothing I can do about it now, is there!