[claps slowly] Well, you pulled it off, ya deviant. Get it? D-viant?
I got it.
Tell me. How are you gonna complete your giant bracelet with the chain-link fence from Dodger Stadium?!
No! [beat] How'd you figure out it was me?
Oh, how did I figure it out? Well, I just followed the clues, used deduction, puzzle-solving, a little bit of forensics, and also, what did I do? Oh, I listened to the voicemail you left me saying you were stealing the D because of Diane so I could, and I quote, "Suck your D"!
Stop leaving voicemails!
Admit it! You like my girlfriend!
Oh, come on! I mean, am I attracted to her? Sure. Do my days feel better when I'm around her? Yeah. Does she get me in ways no woman ever has? Indubitably. Do I fantasize about her? Yes, but only in two positions. Look, am I the kind of guy who would try to steal someone else's girlfriend? Sure, of course, but do I like her? The answer's no. You have nothing to worry about.
I'll cut you a deal. I help you get rid of that D, and you never talk to Diane again.
Well, I have to talk to her, 'cause she's writing my book.
Okay. But just don't pursue her romantically? [BoJack exchange hands]
Deal.
Ha! I knew I'd get that handshake!
I regret this already.
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