Beavis and Butt-Head quotes
1300 total quotesButt-head: Uhh...is this Sesame Street?
Beavis: Oh yeah, that looks like, uh...Grover.
Butt-head: You probably watch Sesame Street.
Beavis: No. I used to watch it when I was a kid. And sometimes, when Sesame Street on Ice comes to town, sometimes I go check that out.
Butt-head: You wussy!
Beavis: [sings] One of these things is not like the other/One of these things just doesn't, uh, belong...
Beavis: Oh yeah, that looks like, uh...Grover.
Butt-head: You probably watch Sesame Street.
Beavis: No. I used to watch it when I was a kid. And sometimes, when Sesame Street on Ice comes to town, sometimes I go check that out.
Butt-head: You wussy!
Beavis: [sings] One of these things is not like the other/One of these things just doesn't, uh, belong...
Butt-head: Uhh...this is kinda irritating.
Beavis: Hehe, yeah. I bet this is one of those songs that, like, it sucks right now, but then later on it starts rocking.
Butt-head: Uhh, how do you know?
Beavis: Cause, that one guy's got a goatee.
Butt-head: Uhh, oh. Well, let's see. [the chorus starts, but it doesn't start rocking] Uuuuhhhh!!! Is that what you're talking about, Beavis?
Beavis: What's going on?
Butt-head: What the hell is going on here?
Beavis: Yeah, what...what is this??
Butt-head: [imitates an arpeggio in the song] Dududududududuh-daaaaaaaaahhh!!!
Beavis: Hehe, yeah. I bet this is one of those songs that, like, it sucks right now, but then later on it starts rocking.
Butt-head: Uhh, how do you know?
Beavis: Cause, that one guy's got a goatee.
Butt-head: Uhh, oh. Well, let's see. [the chorus starts, but it doesn't start rocking] Uuuuhhhh!!! Is that what you're talking about, Beavis?
Beavis: What's going on?
Butt-head: What the hell is going on here?
Beavis: Yeah, what...what is this??
Butt-head: [imitates an arpeggio in the song] Dududududududuh-daaaaaaaaahhh!!!
Butt-head: Uhh...uhh...hey, it's that dude.
Beavis: What dude?
Butt-head: You know, that pilot dude. That one who was like, in a plane and he got shot down over Bogna-Hersnaslovignia. And he's like, a hero and stuff cause he killed all his enemies, and then he lived off bugs for a whole year.
Beavis: He lived off BUGS???
Butt-head: Yeah. That was all he could get to eat, because like, you know, it was somewhere over in Europe, and they don't have Burger World.
Beavis: Wow, that's cool, you know, because I've gone for a few days like that, you know, but then I usually have some nachos and stuff in between meals, so it doesn't really count.
Beavis: What dude?
Butt-head: You know, that pilot dude. That one who was like, in a plane and he got shot down over Bogna-Hersnaslovignia. And he's like, a hero and stuff cause he killed all his enemies, and then he lived off bugs for a whole year.
Beavis: He lived off BUGS???
Butt-head: Yeah. That was all he could get to eat, because like, you know, it was somewhere over in Europe, and they don't have Burger World.
Beavis: Wow, that's cool, you know, because I've gone for a few days like that, you know, but then I usually have some nachos and stuff in between meals, so it doesn't really count.
Butt-head: Uhh...what is this?
Beavis: Oh, I know. This is that song "Cotton-Eyed Joe", we used to sing this in kindergarten.
Butt-head: Oh yeah. I remember that. Kindergarten was cool.
Beavis: Yeah. Kindergarten ruled. They'd give us, like, fingerpaints, and you'd just, like, mess everything up and then you'd, like, drink a bunch of Kool-Aid and then go, like, lie down on your little towel. That rules
Butt-head: That was back when school was cool.
Beavis: Yeah, really. And then sometimes, I'd go running around with my pants down, and I wouldn't get in trouble.
Beavis: Oh, I know. This is that song "Cotton-Eyed Joe", we used to sing this in kindergarten.
Butt-head: Oh yeah. I remember that. Kindergarten was cool.
Beavis: Yeah. Kindergarten ruled. They'd give us, like, fingerpaints, and you'd just, like, mess everything up and then you'd, like, drink a bunch of Kool-Aid and then go, like, lie down on your little towel. That rules
Butt-head: That was back when school was cool.
Beavis: Yeah, really. And then sometimes, I'd go running around with my pants down, and I wouldn't get in trouble.
Butt-head: Uhh...what seems to be the problem there, Beavis?
Beavis: My thingie itches. It's like the wrong color or something...check it out.
Butt-head: Uhh...no thanks, Beavis.
Beavis: (continuing to scratch his pubic area) Ow, rrr, ehh! Ahh!
Beavis: My thingie itches. It's like the wrong color or something...check it out.
Butt-head: Uhh...no thanks, Beavis.
Beavis: (continuing to scratch his pubic area) Ow, rrr, ehh! Ahh!
Butt-head: Uhh...who is this?
Beavis: His name is...I've seen this before...his name is Mike Watt. And later on, he pours a bottle of urine out the window. So don't change it yet.
Butt-head: Uhh, oh. Cool. [sees Watt urinating in a bottle] Is he peeing?
Beavis: Yeah, yeah, he did! That's the name of this song. It's called "Piss Bottle Man".
Butt-head: That's pretty cool, I guess.
Beavis: His name is...I've seen this before...his name is Mike Watt. And later on, he pours a bottle of urine out the window. So don't change it yet.
Butt-head: Uhh, oh. Cool. [sees Watt urinating in a bottle] Is he peeing?
Beavis: Yeah, yeah, he did! That's the name of this song. It's called "Piss Bottle Man".
Butt-head: That's pretty cool, I guess.
Butt-head: Uhh...who's this?
Beavis: This is Buk-a-hey!
Butt-head: Uhh, okay.
[the man in the video is seen with two women]
Beavis: This is Buk-a-hey!
Butt-head: Uhh, okay.
[the man in the video is seen with two women]
Butt-head: Uhh...y'know I don't say this too often, but uh, this sucks.
Beavis: Ummm, you say that all the time, actually.
Butt-head: Uhhh...oh yeah.
Beavis: Ummm, you say that all the time, actually.
Butt-head: Uhhh...oh yeah.
Butt-Head: Uhhh... uhhh...
Buzzcut: Get out there before I drag you out!
[Beavis and Butt-Head get outside]
Buzzcut: Get out there before I drag you out!
[Beavis and Butt-Head get outside]
Butt-head: Uhhh....hey Beavis. Do something, like, I dunno, something funny, or something.
Beavis: Okay. Um...let me see. Check this out. [blows a huge raspberry]
Butt-head: Uhh, that was pretty cool, but you've done that before.
Beavis: Shut up, Butt-head! Then you do something! You think I'm just here to entertain you?
Butt-head: Settle down, Beavis.
Beavis: You think I'm just here for your amusement? You wanna do something about it?
Butt-head: Dumbass.
Beavis: Okay. Um...let me see. Check this out. [blows a huge raspberry]
Butt-head: Uhh, that was pretty cool, but you've done that before.
Beavis: Shut up, Butt-head! Then you do something! You think I'm just here to entertain you?
Butt-head: Settle down, Beavis.
Beavis: You think I'm just here for your amusement? You wanna do something about it?
Butt-head: Dumbass.
Butt-head: Uhhhhhh. I'm tired.
Beavis: Hey Butt-head, you know who these guys are?
Butt-head: No, and I don't care, either.
Beavis: This is Faith No More.
Butt-head: [sarcastic] Yeah, right. Faith No More.
Beavis: No, I'm serious. See, they have a new sound, and a new look.
Butt-head: They just look and sound like everything else.
Beavis: I don't know, it kinda rocks.
Beavis: Hey Butt-head, you know who these guys are?
Butt-head: No, and I don't care, either.
Beavis: This is Faith No More.
Butt-head: [sarcastic] Yeah, right. Faith No More.
Beavis: No, I'm serious. See, they have a new sound, and a new look.
Butt-head: They just look and sound like everything else.
Beavis: I don't know, it kinda rocks.
Butt-head: Uhuhuhuhuh, honor students.
Beavis: Oh yeah, yeah.
Butt-head: It's like, this video looks like one of those old punk bands, you know, but it's like, the video doesn't look old, so it's like, it seems like a bunch of guys now, they're like--
Beavis: Aah, shut up Butt-head!
Butt-head: Uh, okay. Uh, I mean, Beavis, what did you just say?
Beavis: I said shut up! I'm sick and tired of listening to your stupid crap. Just shut up.
Butt-head: Beavis, I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that.
Beavis: Oh yeah, yeah. "I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that." Shut up!
Butt-head: Beavis, there's gonna be two hits: my hand hitting your face, and uh...my hand hitting your face again.
Beavis: Yeah right, and I'm gonna kick you in the nads. Just shut up.
Butt-head: Beavis, don't you ever tell me to shut up. I'm gonna beat the living crap out of you.
Beavis: Yeah yeah yeah right. I'm gonna cave your nads in.
Butt-head: Dammit, Beavis. I'm going to beat the living crap out of your ass.
Beavis: [kicks Butt-head in the testicles, causing him to fall to the floor] Take that, dumbass. Shut up. Yeah yeah, shut up. I'm gonna go get something to eat. [walks away]
Butt-head: [In pain] Beavis, get back here and fight like a man!
Rednex, Cotton Eyed Joe
Beavis: Oh yeah, yeah.
Butt-head: It's like, this video looks like one of those old punk bands, you know, but it's like, the video doesn't look old, so it's like, it seems like a bunch of guys now, they're like--
Beavis: Aah, shut up Butt-head!
Butt-head: Uh, okay. Uh, I mean, Beavis, what did you just say?
Beavis: I said shut up! I'm sick and tired of listening to your stupid crap. Just shut up.
Butt-head: Beavis, I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that.
Beavis: Oh yeah, yeah. "I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that." Shut up!
Butt-head: Beavis, there's gonna be two hits: my hand hitting your face, and uh...my hand hitting your face again.
Beavis: Yeah right, and I'm gonna kick you in the nads. Just shut up.
Butt-head: Beavis, don't you ever tell me to shut up. I'm gonna beat the living crap out of you.
Beavis: Yeah yeah yeah right. I'm gonna cave your nads in.
Butt-head: Dammit, Beavis. I'm going to beat the living crap out of your ass.
Beavis: [kicks Butt-head in the testicles, causing him to fall to the floor] Take that, dumbass. Shut up. Yeah yeah, shut up. I'm gonna go get something to eat. [walks away]
Butt-head: [In pain] Beavis, get back here and fight like a man!
Rednex, Cotton Eyed Joe
Butt-head: Uranus is cool.
Beavis: Oh, thanks! My anus is pretty cool.
Butt-head: [Gets ticked off and slaps Beavis on the chin] Damn it, Beavis, shut up! I was talking about the planet!
Beavis: Oh, thanks! My anus is pretty cool.
Butt-head: [Gets ticked off and slaps Beavis on the chin] Damn it, Beavis, shut up! I was talking about the planet!
Butt-head: Water is cool.
Beavis: Yeah. We should go to somebody's pool, and like, go inside it, and like, go underwater, and just rock out! [sings along] Like a stinky photographing on a wire relay in a state of!
Men Without Hats, The Safety Dance
Beavis: Yeah. We should go to somebody's pool, and like, go inside it, and like, go underwater, and just rock out! [sings along] Like a stinky photographing on a wire relay in a state of!
Men Without Hats, The Safety Dance