Alex Drake quotes from Ashes to Ashes

Gene Hunt

Bolls, don't cry. That's an order.

Alex Drake

I'm not.

Gene Hunt

Now if you don't stop crying, I might even start feeling sorry for you. And God forbid, I might even have to put a comforting arm around you.

Alex Drake

If I may paraphrase Dorothy Parker, I don't think we should put all our eggs in one bastard.

Gene Hunt

What other bastard have we got?

Several people were looking for Mr. Hugh Jarse. And it turned out Mike Rotch was quite popular too.

Alex Drake

Right.

Five or six had chronic asthma and… one man had some very imaginative suggestions.

Alex Drake

I have to stop this infection. Time's running out for me, Guv.

Gene Hunt

Yeah, and time's running out for moi.

Alex Drake

That's French.

Gene Hunt

Sorry, I'm under pressure.

Alex Drake

[on the tape] Why have I pitched up in his world? Any minute now I could be dead. And if he finds me out, what would he do? What would he do if he knew the truth? I have to fight. I have to fight him, but... What does Gene Hunt represent? I- Oh God, I've got to get out of here. I have to get away from him. I hate this place. Maybe Summers can help, but Hunt must never know-

Alex Drake

Tiny doesn't know anything about King Dong, but he's scared, Guv. He says the rot runs right to the top and they are everywhere. "Trust no-one."

Gene Hunt

Yeah, trust. Tricky thing to come by. Why am I a threat to you?

Alex Drake

I don't follow.

Alex Drake

Where the hell did you get that?

Gene Hunt

It was on my desk.

Alex Drake

...He left it for you, didn't he?

Gene Hunt

And who would that be?

Alex Drake

It's very complicated, Guv. It's- it's very difficult to explain.

Gene Hunt

What, you- you analysing yourself now? You love it, don't you? The sound of your own voice. Is that what you do of a night? Sit at home talking into a machine, working out ways of bringing me down?

Alex Drake

No. No, you have to believe I'm on your side.

Gene Hunt

Oh, I want to believe you. But you've got to tell me the God's honest truth about yourself, Drake.

Alex Drake

Time's running out for me here-

Gene Hunt

Yes, it is. You know, I look around, I see Chris taking bungs, the grave of my old boss, bent as a farthing, and I, erm... I feel adrift. You talk to me, Alex. If I mean anything to you at all.

Alex Drake

I'm from the future. I was shot. And I woke up here, with you. Just like Sam Tyler, only... only this is my reality. And I'm fighting not to die because if I die, I will never get home, and it's insane but there it is. And I trust you, which is why I'm telling you the truth.

Alex Drake

Guv?

Gene Hunt

You know, I ask for the truth, and you piss in my face.

Alex Drake

No. No, no, no, no, no, no. Please, please don't do this. I'm telling you the truth. I thought it was all in my head, but Summers, Summers is here too and- and he's from the future and I saw him, I saw him. He shot his younger self. He's behind Operation Rose and I- I don't know why, but I do know that I have to stop him.

Gene Hunt

Get out of my sight, Inspector.

Alex Drake

Where did you go?

Gene Hunt

Abroad. The Isle Of Wight. That was shit, so I tried the Costa Brava. It was the best Full English I've ever had. Then I thought, "Why am I running? Gene Hunt doesn't run". I'm in a mess, Bolls.

Alex Drake

So am I.

Gene Hunt

I'm fighting for my future.

Alex Drake

Me too.

Gene Hunt

Get up. Come here.

Gene Hunt

I'm sorry. I could have hit my target but you fell all wrong.

Alex Drake

Sometimes in life you can't help which way you fall.

Gene Hunt

You do know that when I walk through those doors they're gonna come for me?

Alex Drake

Yeah... Well, there's only one thing for it. Let's fire up the Quattro.

Gene Hunt

What's this? Dorothy Blonde, kidnapped yesterday morning.

Ray Carling

8:21. The parents are on their way in. There's been a ransom demand.

Gene Hunt

Well, we better get her back then, hadn't we? Who's in charge of this shambles?

Ray Carling

I am. I'm a DI now.

Gene Hunt

A DI?!

Ray Carling

It's not that incredible. [Gene walks to the door of his office where his name has been replaced with Ray's] DCI Timmons wanted to keep hold of his office so I thought I would...

Chris Skelton

We didn't think you were coming back, guv.

Gene Hunt

Nor did I after the report you gave the enquiry.

Chris Skelton

They asked all sorts of questions they already knew the answers to.

Alex Drake

Rhetorical.

Chris Skelton

Nah, it was definitely English.

Gene Hunt

You know what!? You'll get every soppy, pustular virgin this side of the Blackwall Tunnel!

Alex Drake

[smugly] At least I'll get some replies.

Gene Hunt

Are you a killer, Harris?

No, Mr Hunt!

Gene Hunt

Are you a dishonest little scrotum who's been buying shit lager with somebody else's chequebook?

Yes, Mr Hunt!

Alex Drake

[exasperated] Is this strictly necessary?

Gene Hunt

No, but it's bloody good fun!

Ray Carling

[chuckling] The oldest trick in the book. "Oh, the wife's just died. I'm bringing up two kids on me own". Next thing you know, your ankles are right behind your ears!

Gene Hunt

Looks like you've been stitched up like a kipper, Bolly!

Alex Drake

[furious] Little shit! Let's get him!

Gene Hunt

I know your professional pride is...

Alex Drake

Piqued?

Gene Hunt

Trampled on like a dead rat. But one gloomy prognosis doesn't make a case, we need evidence. [to Chris] See if he's got a record.

Alex Drake

I could go in again as bait.

Gene Hunt

No, he's already seen you. He liked them young.

Alex Drake

[offended] I am young, you rude git!

Ray Carling

Can I just say, that I might not have been the biggest supporter of women in the police force. [the rest of CID laugh] Hey, it's not my fault I've got an illness with a posh name! What's it called?

Alex Drake

Misogyny.

Ray Carling

But what Shaz did tonight was incredible. [the others applaud] And I for one am very proud to have been a colleague of yours. [the others applaud and cheer]

Ray Carling

If I wanted to wipe out a bunch of dealers, I’d grab 'em, shoot 'em up and overdose 'em. Then they'd be just another statistic.

Alex Drake

We wouldn't've even noticed Warren Johnston's death if the guv had not wanted to speak to him. Which makes you wonder, doesn't it? How many times has this happened before? Because this is murder!

Gene Hunt

Yes, thank you, Quincy.

Jim Keats

You look a little strung out.

Alex Drake

Do I? Well I haven't been sleeping well. Erm... This may sound a bit strange to you but I think I'm being haunted.

Jim Keats

Metaphorically or...

Alex Drake

... No, literally!

Jim Keats

Huh! Odd is probably underselling it a bit then. I can't say I believe in all that sort of thing to be honest.

Alex Drake

No, nor do I, well not in the real world I don't...

Jim Keats

Who is haunting you? An old lady? A creepy child? King Edward the Second?

Alex Drake

It's a police man, actually.

Jim Keats

Oh ,that's interesting.

Gene Hunt

Where you off to Danny? Church?

I'm off to see the girlfriend for a spot of morning glory.

Gene Hunt

What at five in the morning? Do I have gullible written on my forehead?

Alex Drake

Here we go again.

Gene Hunt

You see I know you're lying Danny because your lips move, just like your old man.

Ray Carling

Guv, you'll want to see this.

Gene Hunt

[To Danny] What's this? A little present for the girlfriend?

Gene Hunt

Would somebody like to give me a hand dragging this bastard back over?

Alex Drake

Is there a garden in there?

Gene Hunt

Yes, why?

Vandals broke into the Blue Peter Garden and caused rather a lot of damage and one really cruel thing they did was to pour fuel oil into the fish pond. We've drained the pond and rescued some of the fish although a lot of them have died and the fuel itself has caused a lot of damage. If that wasn't enough, they then smashed our sundial and callously threw into the pond. We hope to repair the damage, but it is very sad to think that there are a few people that take such pleasure in...

Gene Hunt

It's only a bloody garden! [To Shaz] Turn it off.

It’s such a shame, those poor little fish.

Gene Hunt

Off!