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S3

Angel · Season 3

Cordelia, Angel and others in “Waiting in the Wings”

[A security guard is blocking the only way backstage at the ballet.]

Cordelia

You want I should distract him? Make with the nice-nice while you slip by?

Angel

Don't be stupid. I'm that guy and the most beautiful girl I've ever seen is making eyes at me? It's either a bachelor party or a scam.

Cordelia

What did you just call me?

Angel

I'm sorry. You're not stupid.

Cordelia

No. After that.

Angel

I think I'll just have to go with my patented sudden burst of violence.

Cordelia

Hey, hold on. I think I might have an approach that is a little more subtle.

[A smiling Cordelia approaches the guard.]

Cordelia

Hey! Do you like bribes?

Guard

Do I ever.

[Cordelia holds up a $20.]

Cordelia

Well, we really want to go backstage.

Guard

Yeah, okay, but this isn't so much a bribe as it is a tip, and since I'm not parking your car, there's really no way--

[Angel punches guard in the face.]

Angel

Okay, that's how we do it.

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