“In the Dark” quotes from Angel

[Angel has just saved Rachel from a violently abusive boyfriend, while Spike watches -- and narrates -- from the rooftop.]

Spike [as Rachel, falsetto]: How can I thank you, you mysterious, black-clad, hunk of a night thing?

Spike [as Angel, basso]: No need, little lady, your tears of gratitude are enough for me. You see, I was once a bad-ass vampire, but love and a pesky curse defanged me. Now I'm just a big, fluffy puppy with bad teeth. [Rachel sways closer to Angel; he steps back, warding her off with his hands.] No, not the hair! Never the hair!

Spike [as Rachel]: But there must be some way I can show my appreciation.

Spike [as Angel]: No, helping those in need's my job. And working up a load of sexual tension and prancing away like a magnificent poof is truly thanks enough!

Spike [as Rachel]: I understand. I have a nephew who's gay, so...

Spike [as Angel]: Ah. Say no more. Evil's still afoot ... and I'm almost out of that nancy-boy hair gel that I like so much. Quickly! To the Angelmobile -- AWAY! [Rachel and Angel leave. Spike lights a cigarette.]

Spike [as Spike]: Go on, Liam. Play the big, strapping hero while you can. You have a few surprises coming your way--the Ring of Amarra, a visit from your old pal Spike, and--oh, yeah--your gruesome, horrible death.

[Doyle is suffering from a severe hangover.]

Cordelia

[takes the aspirin bottle away from Doyle and dispenses three tablets] I think the 'trick' is laying off the ale before you start quoting Angela's Ashes and weeping like a baby-man.

Cordelia

So I've heard. But I doubt very much that the main characters are Betty and Barney Rubble, as you so vehemently insisted last night. Also? I don't think Oz appreciated being called "my little Bamm-Bamm" all night.