Marshall Flinkman quotes from Alias

Marshall

This place is a ghost town. I don't even know anybody here anymore. Sydney's gone. Dixon, Jack, Vaughn... I mean, the only guy we have left is Sark and that's only because he's in custody... I hate that guy... I mean, really, kinda scary... Although I did go visit him. Twice. Just to see a familiar face. We had eggs.

Weiss

Don't do that.

Jack

Irina Derevko collected 19th century literature. There was a small bookstore in Prague that stocked rare first editions. Whenever I was in town, I'd buy one for her as a gift.

Marshall

Oh, that's sweet.

Jack

The KGB encoded assassination orders in these pages.

Marshall

Oh. Well... that's... not as sweet.

Jack

In the next 24 hours, Sark should lead us to CRF headquarters. We'll put a tactical team on stand-by. For now, we wait.

Marshall

Who wants to order Chinese? I'm starving. [Jack and Vaughn give him identical stares] Thai? Indian?

Marshall

The good thing, slash, bad thing about living in Austria, smoking is not prohibited. Ergo you have just developed a smoking habit. [offers Sydney a cigarette]

Sydney

No, thanks.

Marshall

Good answer, just checking. It is actually a mag strip encoder.

Jack

[on the phone] What's your status?

Marshall

Well, it's really hot here, and everyone keeps calling me Chongo.

Marshall

Oh God. It's oozing. It's oozing everywhere, sir.

Jack

[via cell phone] That means you've ruptured the macula. The eye is useless, abandon it. Approach the second one gently, like a soft-boiled egg. You're going to need a digging instrument to assist with this.

Marshall

I've got a spork.

Jack

What's a spork?

Marshall

It's like a half-spoon... half-fork, will that do?

Jack

That will work.

Nadia

Marshall.

Marshall

Hey, did you hear the news? I get to run an initial analysis on the Hydrosek this afternoon - I love level four biohazard toxins.

Sydney

Remind me to kiss you.

Marshall

Wh-? Ok...

Dixon

What'd she say to you?

Marshall

Uh... nothing.

Marshall

Hey, man, congratulations, that's fantastic! I'm sure Mr. Bristow's gonna be thrilled.

Vaughn

Really? I'm just hoping he doesn't shoot me on the spot.

Weiss

What would Jack do in this situation? Jack is the ... king of this sort of thing.

Marshall

Well, first he'd probably glower a bit, right. Then he'd, I don't know, probably blackmail or torture somebody, right?

Marshall

Sounds awesome!

Marshall

Well, Brazil. Isn't that, you know, the place where they have the, um, string... what are they called, not bikinis but, um--

Jack

Thongs.

Marshall

Yes.

Marshall

It's a subdermal device, placed just below the skull at the brain stem. I've never seen one this small before. Looks like they patched a radio receiver to a powerful microcharge.

Will

So what – what does that mean?

Marshall

It means that they – they put a bomb in your head.

Will

What?!

Marshall

I know, I know. But there's ... good news. Looks like the charge is small enough that the blast will be localized.

Will

Wait – wait. So it might not kill me?

Marshall

No, it'll definitely kill you. There just won't be any collateral damage.

Jack

What I am about to say is not to leave this room. Agent Vaughn is alive.

Marshall

I knew it! I knew he couldn't be dead...!

Marshall

You know, I cried at your funeral.

Vaughn

Um, yeah, uh ... sorry about that.

Marshall

No, no. Thank you. I need a good cry every now and again.