TV QuotesDatabase
S2 E5

ALF · Season 2, Episode 5

ALF and Willie in “Prime Time”

[Willie comes in the kitchen and turns off the TV ALF is watching]

Hey! I wanted to watch Crazy Steve tear a drumstick off that tarantula.

It's 3:00 in the morning, ALF.

What's time to a spider, Willie?

Why is the TV in here?

Because I couldn't move the refrigerator out there.

Don't touch that dial.

I love when you're assertive.

Go. Sleep. Now.

Can I just ask one bedtime question?

Yeah, what?

I saw Polka Jamboree tonight. It's really funny. Why does it get such crummy ratings?

For one thing, it's not supposed to be funny.

What's the other thing?

Nobody watches it.

Next question.

I thought there was gonna be 1 question here.

This is the bonus round. What happens to a show when it's ratings are bad?

It gets cancelled.

[gasps] You mean Polka Jamboree could be cancelled?

We can only hope. Good night, ALF.

Wait, wait. If more people watched Polka Jamboree, the rating would go up right?

Yes, but that would take a miracle.

Well miracle, huh? Well just call me the miracle worker.

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