[Dorothy turns on the light and comes in the kitchen as ALF gets ready to meet with her]
Hi, Grandma!
Oh my god!
Have a seat.
Who are you? What are you?
A little background: My name is ALF. I come from the planet Melmac. I'm a member of a civilization millions of years ahead of your own. And now I live in a laundry basket next to the washing machine. Cup of java?
I know, I know. You're something Willie made. He's always making crazy things in the garage.
Take my word of it. I'm a space being, and since you've been here, I've had to live in the garage. Let me ask you something. Why are you so hard to get along with? Kate's easygoing. Is she adopted or something? Anyway, my advice would be, lighten up on her. Be nice. Oh yeah, another thing. STOP POKING ME! We'll talk again. When you're a little less touchy-feely. [snaps jaws as Dorothy leaves the kitchen]
More from this episode
More ALF quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's ALF pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.