1... 2... 3... 4... 5. [pause] Pete, counting to 5's stopped working
It happened at the weekend. You've got to bribe them with chocolate now.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
What happened? Where am I?
EElf
Well, you know the New Forest?
Yeah...
EElf
It's like that, but in another world.
NNick
I'm a magic stick. Get over it.
ETElder Trevor
She doesn't sound very impressive.
EVElder Vex
Trevor, you're a blob.
Pete, if there was a £50 note in the garden, would you go and get it?
Yes.
Well then you haven't got flu.
What?
Well that's the test, for flu.
But it's fifty quid! Don't you remember what I went through to get that £2 coin I dropped down the loo?
Don't miss my next performance when I will be showcasing my rain spell... weather permitting.
[A younger Wizard Bradley is in a nightclub surrounded by women]
It actually looks like a wand!
[Wizard Bradley reaches in vain for his dropped hat as the temple doors close behind him]
My haaaaaaaaaaaat! [pause] Can easily be replaced.
EElf
Ennythingos: home of the sacred fire and our version of the clap, so just don't.
NNarrator
Far far ago, the ancients wrote upon the scrolls that dark forces would sweep our realm, until only Yonderland remained. But they told also of a saviour, come from a distant world to save us from the shadows. Can you dig?
EElders
Kill the blob! Smash him in! Eat the blob!
VEVice Elder Flowers
Eat his face!
SEScribe Elder Ho-Tan
Woah woah, wait, I thought you were a vegetarian?
VEVice Elder Flowers
Is he not a vegetable?
SEScribe Elder Ho-Tan
Grey area, like fish.
NNegatus
He's not hiding, you cretin, he's dead!
NNegatus
You have failed me for the last time.
DJDemon Jeff
Please, I can keep failing you!
BBabbas
Perfect! A little helper! How are you at holding stuff?
DJDemon Jeff
It's on my CV, but then again, so's computer skills, and I've no idea what that means.
PFPicket Fence 1
Where did you get the egg?
PFPicket Fence 2
Honestly? From the bum of a bird.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Yonderland pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.