Xavier: Renegade Angel Season 1 quotes

(crossing himself) I accept Jesus Christ into my heart as my personal savior! Yes, made it!

I gotta go make water.

Spray it, don't say it.

(to himself) I'd like to see this guy pray an abortion.

If my dad found out I was using science to help him with his Christian Science, he'd be crushed. Promise me you won't tell him about all this. Daddy can't ever know about my lab. He thinks science is evil, and the Lord heals all.

How does he explain the fact that his own son's legs make me want to puke all over them?

Um, he never says that.

Kid, life is just death in drag.

You're not better than me, okay?! Just because you've created life doesn't make you some kind of god. There's more to life than life!

Well, I tell you; I'd swim through a lake full of water for these cakes. That's the only thing that would put out the raging fire in my belly for these cakes.

That's an odd thing to say.

(Dousing himself in gasoline, after learning that all of his surgeries were played by his son) All that is real is ANNIHILATION!

You need to move on from losing your father back there. You need closure.

Closure?! The explosion hasn't even ended yet!

Does anyone know how to get to the lake?

Does anyone know how to get to the lake?

Do you know how to get to the lake?

Do you know how to get to the lake?

Does anyone know how to get to the lake?

Oh no! I'm heading right towards the Cyclone.

Does anyone know how to get to the lake?

Can you tell me how to get to the lake?

How are you going to get there? By car?

I'm driving right now.

Okay. First, you're gonna wanna get in your car. Then, you're gonna wanna start your car.

A lot of people get half-way to the lake and they realize they forgot to start their car.

What?

I'm just joshing you.

That's just lake humor.

Uh, I'll find it myself.

Man. I'll never sell these arrows.

They say when you die, you shit your pants; but not me. I'm gonna shit my heart.

Fate. Destiny. Fatestinatey. People toss those words around like tennis balls. Well, I eat balls for breakfast. I know my purpose is righting wrongs. I'm the wrong-righter, but I don't need you to call me that. I have special needs. Just call me...

Kids, I swear, I'm gonna love all of you, and equally. I'll be dividing my love into seven equal sections, or "Love Quadrants". Each quadrant will be worth 15 "Love Units" represented by these small brass marbles. You may use these marbles as currency amongst yourselves. Collect 35 "Love Units", you can trade those in for a beach towel with my face on it. Collect more than 3 towels...

Where are my babies? Where are my babies?

Keep it down, lady, we got families around here.

Aaaah, have you seen my babies?

I'm poppin' a peek at a smokin' babe right now.

I lost seven of my babies!

Tragic, I've got septuplets myself. I don't know what I'd do if I lost them. Good thing I'm a responsible parent. You should try it sometime.

This is no longer a clue. It's a game. You may have just gotten checkmate, but we're playing Chinese checkers, and as my old friend Confucius say; the hunter has become the hunter-ed. The chaser has become the chosed. Dame Fortuna has had her franking privileges revoked. It seems the portrait has painted the artist, sketching the reverser, who has become the reverse-ed. But this time the suffixed will become the sufferer, and it appears the baby killer is about to kill a baby.