[Jerry Lawler talks to Val Venis about how his ordeal with Kaientai went the week before]
Are you still hanging in there?
Hello, ladies. You know tonight I come to you a humble man, half the man that I used to be, but you know, it's like they say - you live by the sword and you die by the sword. You know there's only one way to stop the mighty boa - and that's to sever it at the head. Well ladies, you better take a rain check on them new snakeskin boots, because - because - the Big Valbowski is alive and ready to bite, baby! Well you know something, thanks to a cold butcher's block, heh heh heh, and a little shrinkage, and of course my good friend, John Wayne Bobbitt, who just happened to cut the lights just at the appropriate time, the Big Valbowski is standing at full attention, cocked, rocked and ready to unload.
We live on the edge - Val ordered a club soda with a slice and the bartender tried to cut us off.
John I don't want to cut you short - but I understand your ex-wife Lorena actually threw something out the window and it was lost out there for a while, but they found it right?
Yeah they found it.
Well that's a good thing because I was thinking how funny a picture of that would look on the side of a milk carton.
[to Yamaguchi-san's wife] Baby, it's been a long, hard road - but it ends right here, baby! You know something, ah don't cry baby, you see NO woman is worth the trouble that you brought me - no woman! I hope you enjoyed the ride baby, because this is where you get off! So take your shoes from under my bed and hit the bricks. Adios! Goodbye lady!
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