[voiceover] The next morning, we were told our problem would not be gunk, but dust, so James and I had to rethink our wardrobe solutions.
[Camera switches to show Jeremy heavily-clad in clothing]
I've teamed my kikoi with a bin liner, v-necked, last time I wore one of these, ah, I went to see The Clash. [voiceover] Frankly, I all thought it was a bit much. I mean, How bad could this dust be?
[Camera switches to all Jeremy, Richard and James driving through a massive dust storm]
AHHHHHHH! MY EYES!
Oh god, this is awful, I can't even see Jezza already [coughs heavily]
[voiceover] Meanwhile in my unmodified Kadett...
[Camera switches to Richard in Oliver the Opel, who is unbothered by the dust due to refusing to strip his car out]
I'll adjust this quarterlight a bit, ah that's better.
Oh no, no, NO! Look at this bit now.
[his kikoy falls off] The kikoy's come off. [coughs heavily] Hello?
[voiceover] James and I made it through the dust with our lives considerably shortened.
[to James] I've got consumption and TB.
[coughs heavily]
I've got every single 1920's disease.
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More Top Gear quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's Top Gear pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.