[Mulder throws his sunflower seeds at Ronnie, which forces him to pick them up]
RSRonnie Strickland
Oh man! What'd you have to go and do that for?! (begins picking up seeds, points at Mulder) You are in big trouble.
S5 E12Bad Blood
[Scully finds Mulder barely conscious in their hotel room]
Mulder?
..Who's the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks? Shaft! Can ya dig it? (Scully looks at Mulder, disbelieving)They say this cat Shaft is a bad mother- shut your mouth! Talkin' 'bout Shaft.
[Cuts to Mulder's office, as he reacts to Scully's version of the story]
I did not!
You're saying that I actually hit him two times.
Square in the chest. No effect.
..and then he sort of flew at me like a flying squirrel.
I don't think I'd use the phrase "flying squirrel" when I talk to Skinner, but.. yeah, that's what happened.
CCoroner
Probable cause of death.. [looking at Ronnie Strickland's body with a stake through the heart] Gee, that's a tough one.
[Mulder and Scully are awaiting outside Skinner's office]
(whispering) Mulder, please just keep reminding him you were drugged.
Would you stop that?
It wouldn't hurt.
Stop it.
[Skinner sticks his head out of his office]
Scully, Mulder-
[Mulder jumps to his feet]
I was drugged!
(sighs) ..I want you two back in Texas - Ronnie Strickland's body has gone missing from the morgue; in conjunction with this the coroner's been attacked. His throat was bitten.
The coroner's dead?
(uncomfortably) No.. his throat was.. bitten. It was sort of.. gnawed on. (Mulder and Scully exchange a look) Daylight's burning, agents.
(bewildered) But.. he was dead!
(bemused) I noticed that.
He had a stake through his heart!
I noticed that too.
Mulder, he had fake fangs. Why would a real vampire need fake fangs? I mean, for the sake of argument?
Fangs are very rarely mentioned in the literature; they're more or less an invention of Bram Stoker's. I think you were right before when you said this was about a guy who's watched too many Dracula movies. It's just that he happens to be a real vampire.
(to the sheriff) You can stay behind here with Agent Scully and keep an eye on things where I go check something out. (whispers to Scully, with a bad southern accent) Don't say I never did nothin' for ye!
He's just not who we are anymore. I mean we pay taxes, we're good neighbors. Old Ronnie.. he just can't seem to grasp the concept of.. low profile. But, though he may be a moron, he is one of our own.
So that's it. They simply disappeared without a trace. And that's exactly what happened from start to finish?
..Well I can neither confirm nor deny Agent Mulder's version of events which occurred outside my presence.
And I can neither confirm nor deny Agent Scully's version of events, but, uh..
Anyway... I was drugged.
That is, essentially exactly the way it happened.
Essentially.
..Except for the part about the buck teeth.
S5 E13Patient X
Before the exploration of space, of the moon and the planets, man held that the heavens were the home and province of powerful gods, who controlled not just the vast firmament but the earthly fate of man himself, and that the pantheon of powerful warring deities was the cause and reason for the human condition, for the past and future, and for which great monuments would be created, on earth as in heaven. But in time man replaced these gods with new gods and new religions that provided no more certain or greater answers than those worshipped by his Greek or Roman or Egyptian ancestors. And while we've chosen now our monolithic and benevolent gods and found our certainties in science, believers all, we wait for a sign, a revelation. Our eyes turn skyward, ready to accept the truly incredible, to find our destiny written in the stars. But how do we best look to see? With new eyes or old?
[Alex Krycek and a squad of soldiers approach Marita Covarrubias and a group of UN peacekeeping troops at a mass incineration site]
(speaking in Russian) Under what authority are you corrupting this crime scene?
MCMarita Covarrubias
(responds in Russian) Under the United Nations Charter - Chapter 7, Articles 39 and 42.
(chuckles) Your authority isn't recognized here. Nor are your lies.
MCMarita Covarrubias
These are U.N. peacekeepers. This is a mission of mercy.
This is a mission of fear. Yours and the men you work for.
MCMarita Covarrubias
(scoffs) I don't know what you're talking about.
You go back and you tell them what you've seen here - What you've found.
MCMarita Covarrubias
My name is Marita Covarrubias - I'm a Special Representative to the Secretary General of the United Nations.
I know who you are - I know who you work for. Now you go back and you tell them -
MCMarita Covarrubias
Tell them what? What happened here?
..Tell them it's all going to hell.
WDr. Werber
The regression hypnosis work I did with you-
No, I'm not questioning your methods, Dr Werber. I'm questioning myself, and how I was tricked. How I was led to believe, through an elaborate staging of events, that my sister had been abducted.
WDr. Werber
A man with faith can indulge in the luxury of skepticism.
I don't think you understand. There's just too much evidence that it's all been a lie. The conspiracy is not to hide the existence of extraterrestrials. It's to make people believe in it so completely that they question nothing.
WDr. Werber
So, you and I have been advocates of insanity all along? Is this the extreme possibility you believe in now?
Well, look who's answering the bat-phone.
[Scully throws a newspaper at Mulder.]
Shouldn't that be my picture next to the headline? [A picture of Mulder with the headline, "All this conjecture about little green men - false, dangerous, delusional."] ..Or is that just you having a little fun?
Do I look like I'm having fun, Scully?
You look constipated, actually.
That would make sense - I've had my head up my rear end for the last five years.
This wouldn't have anything to do with Cassandra Spender?
Cassandra Spender is living proof that the truth I've been so boldly seeking for the last five years is the truth of a madman.
How's that?
One more anal-probing gyro-pyro levitating ecoplasm alien anti-matter story and I'm going to take out my gun and shoot somebody.
Well - I guess I'm done here; You seem to have invalidated your work. Have a nice life.
S5 E14The Red and the Black
[Mulder stands next to Scully, who is laying on a bed in the hospital, and move a strand of her bangs out of her eyes. She begins to wake up.]
Mmm. [Opens her eyes.] What time is it?
(laughing) "What time is it?" It's time to thank your lucky stars.
Why are you laughing?
I'm not laughing at you! (smiles) I'm just very happy to be standing here talking to you, that's all.
(getting concerned) Mulder, what am I doing here?
You were airlifted here in vasogenic shock.
From what?
You've got some first-degree burns, and scorching on your hands and face.
(touches face, not understanding) From what?
You don't remember?
Mulder... [Looks at the tv, which is showing a report about the attack, along with images of many of the dead bodies found at the scene.]
Is any of this coming back to you?
I was there? [Mulder sighs.] Well, doing what?
I was hoping you were going to answer that question for me.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The X-Files pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.