The White Lotus · Season 1
You're just here with your assistant, right?
No, I actually came here with my husband, but he left.
He left you alone in Sicily?
[Tanya nods]
Why would he leave you?
It's a long story.
No, we have all day. Tell me everything, from the beginning.
Well, I was born in San Francisco...
Oh, the very beginning, alright.
So you see, it's just been a series of .. very bad decisions.
No. you've had very bad luck.
I know, I know.
You're like the.. heroine of your own Italian opera.
Does that mean I'm doomed?
No. Of course it doesn't. You're too fabulous to be sad. Look where you are. Drink your rosé. Best thing about luck is it can always change.
Do you really believe that?
No.
I put on fresh underwear for ya.
Why? Did you shit your pants?
If you're looking for a friend, gay guys are really the best. Because, let's face it, women are kinda... depressing.
Oh. You think?
Yeah. I think most women are drips. But it's not their fault. Yeah. They have a lot to be depressed about. But you know, they are not fun. These gay guys are fun.
Why is it always men who have the power?
If we didn't, pretty girls like you wouldn't get to skip to the front of the line.
These are some high-end gays.
Oh, it's a good feeling when you realize that someone has money. 'Cause then you don't have to worry about them wanting yours.
Cameron would always sleep with the girls that I liked, but before I could get to them. If I ever told him that I liked a girl, he would swoop in and have sex with them within a week.
Cameron. Rude.
You have a bad case of something called mimetic desire.
What's that?
If someone with higher status than you wants something, it means it's more likely that you'll want it, too.
You did not have higher status than me.
Not then, maybe. I mean, I was smarter than you. Maybe you thought that fucking women I had a connection with would make you smarter.
You can't really be surprised, can you?
By what?
Well, that he's running around with an escort.
What do you mean?
You've normalized it for him.
Right, like you normalized it for me.
Oh, I never ran around with hookers.
I don't run around with hookers either.
Dom. Didn't you run around with that exact hooker? You gave her the key to my room.
You know the reason I am the way I am is because of you.
You're blaming me for your situation? That's rich.
Do you think you were so discrete? Do you? I mean, how many nights did I hear Mom cry herself to sleep? Get real. Everybody knew, Dad. Everybody knew. Everybody knew.
We had a great marriage.
Oh, my God. You are deluded. You made her life hell my entire childhood. Do you have amnesia?
If I made her life hell, why'd she stay with me?
I have no idea. She didn't know any better. She was a martyr. I don't know.
She loved me.
She was a bitter woman. And she died a bitter woman, and she knew about everything you did. Believe me. You were just too self-involved to even notice that. Yeah, and you know what, I... I don't blame you for my situation, but I sure fucking could. Because you never... showed me how to love a woman. You never... showed me how to be intimate. You never showed me how to put others first. You always put yourself first. Always. So I did the same thing.
I loved your mother. And she loved me.
It's not that simple.
Yes, it is.
Other than the cowboy, love's never been my Achilles heel. It was always beauty.
Hm. I live for beauty.
I know you do.
I do.
I'd also die for beauty. Wouldn't you? A world without beauty... is not a world I want to live in.
Well... you couldn't ask for a more beautiful world... than this.
Here's to beauty.
To beauty.
Portia. When I see you, I... I see a younger version of me. You know, when I was a little girl, my mother used to dress me up like a little doll. And I was always a little doll, waiting for someone to play with me. You know, when you're empty inside and you have no direction, you'll end up in some crazy places, right? But you'll still be lost.
What are you trying to say? Like...
Get your shit together, Portia.
You always think there's gonna be a homecoming. The embrace of a woman... who tells you you've done all right. Well, there is no homecoming. Not for me, not anymore.
What are some of your goals?
I don't know. Be satisfied? Yeah, that'd be nice.
I think you just gotta live every day as it comes, do you know what I mean? Like, that's what I'd do anyway. Who knows if we're even gonna be here tomorrow?
Yeah. That's very true. The world's a fucked-up place. So...
What's wrong with it?
Are you joking?
Pretty fucking good world, I'd say.
Literally everything's falling apart.
You'd rather live in the Middle Ages then, would ya? When they were ripping each other to shreds, yeah? They were way worse than ISIS or any of them lot. Like, it's a fucking miracle anyone's even left in Europe. All we've been doing is just fuckin' hacking each other to bits and burning each other at the stake. I'm ready for another beer. All I'm saying is, right, we're fucking lucky, do you know what I mean? Like, we're living in the... best time in the history of the world, on the best fucking planet. If you can't be satisfied living now, here... you're never gonna be satisfied. So, let's get pissed, eh?
Well, what does he do for a living?
Oh, this and that. Niccolò may or may not have ties to a very influential local family.
Oh, he joined the mafia?
Did I say that? I didn't say that. We don't use that word in Palermo.
No wonder they all left. Who would I have been if I lived here?
You wouldn't have lived here, you would've left. There are people who stay and there are people who leave.
And I'm someone who leaves?
Hmm, 'cause you got wanderlust. You get that from me.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The White Lotus pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
