Eugene Young quotes from The Practice

Eugene

The general description you were talking about, that would be...black...big head? :Police Officer: Yes.

Eugene

Did you or your partner approximate the circumference of my client's cranium?

Eugene

Until you've been yanked out of your car, until you've been searched because of how you look, until you see the look of fear in somebody else's eyes staring back at you simply because you're black...until that kind of thing happens to you over, and over, and over, and over, and over, you can't know.

Eugene

You said that God has those kids. That tells me you believe in God. You got to be afraid of what the Almighty has in store for you. He's vengeful. Let's not forget that. Those little boys got parents. Let them bury their kids.

Eugene

Dr. Walsh, though I represent Mr. Parks I will give you a free tip: if this ever ends up in court you don't want to be saying things like you hope to find a big, green tumor the size of a softball.

Eugene

Then there's the smell.

Pearson

Beg pardon?

Eugene

Well, the jury takes a whiff of this, a whiff of that, gets kind of a hunch for the truth. They're going to smell your client, smell ours, smell you, smell me. Kind of like scratch and sniff litigation.

Pearson

You have some secret strategy unknown to any other law firm in the world?

Eugene

We cheat.

You threatened to break his kneecaps?

Eugene

Not break...dislocate.

Right in front of his lawyer?

Eugene

Well, it would have been unethical for me to do it outside of counsel.

Eugene

Do you think it's unreasonable for a black man in South Boston to be nervous about two policemen pulling up and illuminating him like a deer caught in their headlights?

I don't think he had any reason to be nervous if he were innocent.

Eugene

[sarcastically] Silly me.

Bobby

I can't do it.

Eugene

What do you mean "you can't do it"? We do it everyday. The client is always guilty. We always do it. What do you mean "you can't do it"?

Eugene

The first thing they teach you in law school is never, ever fall in love with a client.

Bobby

They don't teach you that.

Eugene

Well they should!

What are you doing?

Eugene

You told Jennifer Cole that she may want to have a conversation with her pimp?

Oh, ok. [Flood attempts to push the elevator button, and Eugene blocks him] OK, so far I have you on false imprisonment. You want to keep going?

Eugene

I'm thinking about it. You crossed the line, Dickie.

Bobby

Eugene, you claim I don't understand. I'll accept that, I will. I don't understand what it's like to be subjected...over and over and over again. I'll accept I'll never get that. But you know a man did die here, and the "I've had it" theory as a defense to manslaughter, I'll never understand that either.

Eugene

Just a legal strategy. You got yours and...I got mine.

Bobby

Yeah. But yours came from the heart.

Eugene

Bobby, on the next one, I want off.

Bobby

What do you mean, you want off?

Eugene

I mean, I want off. One rape a week is my limit.

Lindsay

I have a client who could be perceived as um, a little too quick to sue. I'm worried one or more of the jurors may have seen your commercial.

Jimmy

And?

Lindsay

And, um, with a litigious plaintiff I don't think it helps our cause to be associated with Jimmy The Grunt.

Jimmy

Go to hell.

Eugene

Jimmy, she's not wrong.

Jimmy

Well you go to hell, too.

Eugene

It may just be a notice of appearance, Jimmy. It's not necessarily their ruling.

Jimmy

It's their ruling. Whether we have to split the trial or not, the answer's right here.

Eugene

Well, maybe you should open it.