Here at THE ROCK, we have two basic rules. The first rule is: OBEY ALL RULES. Secondly: Do not write on the walls, as takes a lot of work...to erase writing...OFF of walls. Now as we tell all men when these doors shut behind them, you are starting a new life. If you are wise, you'll begin rehabilitation.
Played by Don Knotts
The Andy Griffith Show · 64 quotes
Most-quoted character in The Andy Griffith Show: in 18 of its 64 quotes
Lines by Barney Fife 18
Jay walking is rampant!
Of course you smell gas. What do you think this car runs on, coal?
Deputy Barney FifeNip it! Nip it in the bud!
"You got to spend a quid and some bobs to get anything good these days." Barney talking with Andy and Malcom Merriwether in 'The Return of Malcom Merriwether'.
"Well, where there's smoke there's firewater." Barney to Andy in 'Aunt Bee's Medicine Man.'
"Maybe this will explain why Aunt Bee's feeling so good." Barney to Andy in 'Aunt Bee's Medicine Man.'
"Sure Mike, sure." Barney drunkenly says to Andy after Otis spikes the spring water in 'Barney and the Governor.'
BarneyWanted posters came in, Andy.
Barney(reading posters) Let's see what we got here. "Henry 'Shopping Bag' Leonetti. Grand Larceny; $4,000 reward." "Max 'The Tongue' Rasmussen. Grand Theft Auto; reward $1,500." "Benjamin Schuster, alias Benjy Schus, alias Benny Schut. Forgery; reward $3,000." You know what this means, Andy?
Barney8,500 American silver cartwheels right in our hands; only one small hitch.
BarneyRight!
BarneyYeah, like I promised you, Sheriff. Law and order kept in Mayberry this here day!
BarneyI had them, Andy! I had them all dead to rights! You can check the manual! Every one of them was as guilty as sin!
BarneyYeah; I guess you're right. I was just trying to show you how much you could trust me.
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