SummerSlam quotes

Isn't it ironic that the colors of Michigan are yellow?

And blue.

But mostly yellow.

They're not yellow, they're gold, Bobby Heenan.

How lucky am I? My very first assignment is SummerSlam. This is bigger than life! Thank you, Vince McMahon, for bringing me on board. We've just seen a title match, we're about to see another one. Shawn Michaels has the Intercontinental belt, he's gonna take on Mr. Perfect. Shawn is here along with his bodyguard Diesel. Shawn, you've won it, you've lost it, you've won it, can you hang onto this thing?

Now all the questions are gonna be answered—who is the greatest Intercontinental Champion of all time? Is it Mr. Perfect or is it Shawn Michaels? All those answers are gonna come across tonight, and I will prove to everybody—you and all of the world—that Shawn Michaels is the greatest Intercontinental Champ.

Now wait a minute, they say that Mr. Perfect caused you to lose it and Diesel won it back for you.

I got news for you. Who's the one that's wearing it? It's Shawn Michaels, so I must've won it. Isn't that right, Diesel?

That's right. The Heartbreak Kid can take care of the work in the ring. Hey, everybody knows the chicks dig this guy—I'm here just to keep 'em off the champ. Let's get outta here, Champ.

Detroit used to be known as the Motor city. Now it's known as the tax cheat city!

(On 1-2-3 Kid's first PPV appearance) This is a first! This is a first! This is the first time that Kid's been out past eight o'clock!

(To Vince McMahon) Wrong, wrong, wrong, tuxedo breath!

Cover him! It's over! He got him! (IRS kicks out) No he didn't.

Whaddya mean it's over?!? It's not over!

Well, call it what you will, call it luck, call it ability, call it the fact that the 1-2-3 Kid will take high-risks like no one else ever in the WWF, whatever it is, you can call him victorious.

You could call him stupid.

Ouch! Hit him right on the bicusbid.

The what?

The bicusbid.

What do you know about bicusbids?

You're asking and answering your own questions, you really are the Brain, aren't you?

Well, I have to, when I'm with...

Yeah right, when you're with what?

Uh, nothing.

He hit him so hard he knocked three zits off his cheek!

Cheating is only cheating when you get caught, and bragging isn't bragging when you can do it.

Well, I think he shines more, uh, his ability to think for himself without relying on a partner, could be an advantage of, uh, of Mr. IRS, but I would have to say just by watching him and the way I've been watching him and the way you, in the ring right now, I'd have to say that... yeah, the Kid's in trouble.

Could you care to repeat that please?

Well... no.

I see.

(On Irwin R. Schyster) He doesn't like to be called Irwin, he doesn't like to be called Schyster, what does he like to be called?

R.

That's Bruce Hart right? Did he ever play a banjo in the movie Deliverance?

(Jerry Lawler has Bret Hart up against the ringpost) We saw Doink earlier ram Bret's leg into the ringpost, now what's Lawler going to do? (Lawler crotches Bret against the post) Oh no!

(High voice) Oh it's going to happen to Bret "The Hitman" Hart.

Stop it Bobby Heenan!