Star Trek: The Original Series · Season 1
I have a question for the doctor. [Kirk leaves] Doctor, the ship's temperature is increasingly uncomfortable for me. I've adjusted the environment in my quarters to one hundred twenty five degrees, which is at least tolerable. However, I -
Well, I see I'm not going to be making any house calls on you!
I wondered if perhaps there was something which could lower my sensitivity to cold.
I'm not a magician, Spock - just an old country doctor.
Yes...as I always suspected.
Intuition, however illogical, Mr. Spock, is recognized as a command prerogative.
I'll bet he [Spock] left a bad taste in the creature's mouth, too.
Thank heaven!
Mr Scott, there was no deity involved. It was my cross-circuiting to B that recovered them.
Then thank pitchforks and pointed ears.
In the strict scientific sense, Doctor, we all feed on death, even vegetarians.
Women are more easily and more deeply terrified, generating more sheer horror than the male of the species.
Computer. This is a Class-A compulsory directive. Compute, to the last digit, the value of pi.
When are y'gonna get off that milk diet, lad?
This is vodka!
Where I come from, that's soda pop. Now, this is a drink for a man.
Scotch?
Aye.
It was invented by a little old lady from Leningrad!
A most curious creature, Captain. [He puts the tribble to his ear] Its trilling seems to have a tranquilizing effect on the human nervous system. [mild shrug] Fortunately, of course, I am [he starts to sound drowsy]...immune to its...effect...[by this point he's nearly asleep on his feet. He abruptly wakes with a jerk and quickly puts the tribble down]
Doctor, I am well aware of human characteristics. I am frequently inundated by them, but I've trained myself to put up with practically anything.
Spock, I don’t know too much about these little tribbles yet, but there is one thing that I have discovered.
What is that, Doctor?
I like them - better than I like you.
Doctor, they do indeed have one redeeming characteristic: they do not talk too much.
Too much of anything, Lieutenant, even love, isn't necessarily a good thing.
Captain, Starfleet was able to divert that freighter.
Good. That means Sherman's Planet will get its quadrotriticale [he looks around the Bridge]...only a few weeks late. I don't see any tribbles around here.
And you won't find a tribble on this entire ship.
Bones, how did you do it?
I cannot take credit for another man's work. Scotty did it.
Scotty! Where are the tribbles?
Oh, er, Captain, it was really Mister Spock's recommendation.
Of course. Spock.
Based on computer analysis, of course, taking into account the possibilities of -
Gentlemen, I don't want to interrupt this mutual admiration society, but I'd like to know where the tribbles are.
Tell him, Spock.
Well, it was Mister Scott who performed the actual engineering.
Mister Scott. [slowly, for emphasis] Where are the tribbles?
I used the transporter, Captain.
You used the transporter?
Aye.
Where did you transport them? Scott, you didn't transport them into space, did you?
Captain Kirk, that'd be inhuman!
Well, where are they?
I gave them a good home, sir.
[exasperated now] Where?!
I gave them to the Klingons, sir.
[whisper] You gave them to the Klingons?!
Aye, sir. Before they went into warp, I transported the whole kit and kaboodle into their engine room, where they'll be no tribble at all.
You mean ... you're gonna leave here without them, and run off on some wild goose chase halfway across the galaxy, just because you found a discrepancy in a hydrogen cloud?
Doctor, I'm chasing the Captain, Lieutenant Uhura and Ensign Chekov, not some wild aquatic fowl.
Well, Mr. Spock, if you’re going into the lion’s den, you’ll need a medical officer.
Daniel, as I recall, had only his faith, but I welcome your company, Doctor.
My people pride themselves on being the greatest, most successful gamblers in the universe. We compete for everything -- power, fame, women -- everything we desire, and it is our nature ... to win.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Star Trek: The Original Series pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
