Nikki quotes from Silent Witness

Nikki

(pulls rope around Harry's neck)

Harry

Oww!

Nikki

I think you like it really.

Harry

Woah (as car suddenly stops)

Nikki

Sorry.

Harry

Oh no. I love the feel of whiplash in the morning.

Nikki

What happened? Have you been put on something else?

Harry

Apparently.

Nikki

Oh well. Enjoy.

Harry

(in mocking tone) Oh what a shame. I thought it would've been fun to do the bone finding thing together.

Harry

Sadly he is now at one with the subsoil of the kingslin motorcross track. So I will now never know whether or not he gave her variant CJD.

Nikki

So...in other words, you might be free for the next 3 or 4 hours?

Nikki

Her name's Morona Hearne. She's Floria's mother and she's being treated for psychotic episodes relating to bipolar.

Harry

How do you know? And why am I carrying your bag?

Harry

Leo? Do you know where Leo is?

Nikki

Is he not in his office?

Harry

Oh yes. His office. Let me check again for the second time. No, still not there.

Nikki

Maybe he's in a hotel with his lover.

Harry

Which one?

Nikki

Which hotel or which lover?

Harry

Never mind.

Harry

You did make him pay for the first date didn't you?

Nikki

Was I meant to?

Harry

Yes! And you know...you're not going to...offer up the goodies too soon?

Nikki

What goodies?

Harry

Oh God, I'm too late, aren't I?

Harry

Only me. She's gone home.

Nikki

But I thought I sensed romance,

Harry

There is romance.

Nikki

But she's a student. That's illegal.

Harry

Leo.

Nikki

You and Leo?

Harry

Leo and Janet.

Harry

Are we all ready?

Nikki

Within reason

Harry

She questions my taste.

Harry

You could back me up

Nikki

That's rarely any fun

Harry

You identifying with her or something? Is this some kind of girl thing?

Nikki

I wonder who put the 'men' in mentor?

Harry

Perhaps whoever put the 'you' in pain in the neck.

Harry

I don't need the flattery of my students thanks.

Nikki

Just because you've never dissected a flattery gland, doesn't mean you haven't got one.

Leo

[about the pumpkin scrubs] And that's where you got that?

Harry

Yeah. Should've worn them to the dinner. Would have camouflaged the spill from Nikki's Piña Colada.

Nikki

It was a tiny splash.

Harry

It wasn't the size, it was the location.

Nikki

Well I think you did an amazing job. The proverbial needle in a hay stack.

Harry

Proverbial bomb in a hay stack more like.

Nikki

Better not say that too loudly. Bomb. I was told that if you said certain key words more than five times, MI5 would come down and swoop on you.

Harry

What? You think we're being bugged do you?

Nikki

Well how else did they know that I was taking my laptop home?

Harry

Eh...bicycle, tricycle, icicle....bomb, bum, does my bomb look big in this?

Nikki

(giggling in hysterics)

Leo

What's so funny?

Nikki

Shhh

Harry

Walls have ears.

Leo

Have you started without me?

Nikki

Oh...just what i need. A drink.

Harry

Oh we're going for a drink now.

Nikki

Leo said that he was gonna take us for a slap up meal.

Harry

Oh good call Leo. eh...its now dinner.

Leo

I did not say that I would pay for it.

Harry

Eh dinner somewhere very expensive. See you there.

Nikki

Harry! There's more bacteria in a human bite than a human rectum.

Harry

Oh really. Didn't have time to find out sadly

Harry

Perhaps you'd prefer it if I retrained as a paramedic?

Nikki

Perhaps you'd prefer it if I retrained as one of your adoring 25 year olds?

Harry

It's a bit late for that isn't it?