Kenny and Mike in “Unfinished Business”

[about Mike's copy of The Tao of Pooh] Yeah, whatever. Hand it over.

Mike

Why?

Because a firehouse is no place for sensitive souls, Probie.

Mike

You used to write poetry.

Yeah, and it cost me my house, and my wife and a whole lot more so give it over.

Mike

You can't order me to stop reading.

I'm not. I'm ordering you to stop filling your mind with this bullshit fortune cookie philosophy. You're taking life lessons from a semi-retarded bear, Mikey. And it's not even a real bear. Consider yourself fortunate that you're not burdened by an overactive mind. Stick to cartoons and coloring books.

Mike

I'm not stupid, y'know, I'm just simple-minded. The book says Pooh's like an uncarved block. Y'know, that's kind of how I feel.

An uncarved block. That's hard to disagree with.

Mike

You're busting balls, but y'know, Winnie's as simple as they come. He just roams the woods, hangs with his pals, eats some honey, takes a nap. He doesn't care about understanding anything or even himself or the names that people call him. He just is. He accepts things as they are. That's the key to his happiness.

And that's what this is, you're a little depressed about the fact that we're going to keep callin' you the probie. And that is the little problem that caused this little egxtensial life crisis. You don't know problems kid.

Mike

I'm just starting to realize that nobody's ever gonna have all the answers, y'know? You may think you know everything, but you don't. And you can't. And you never will. So you should just stop trying and life will get a lot easier.