Reno 911! quotes

Terry: Have you ever had skittles? They're like pure sugar!

Officer Garcia has been shot

Deputy James Garcia: Oh, God, call for help.

Deputy Trudy Wiegel: Help! Help!

Deputy James Garcia: Use your goddamn radio.

repeated line

Deputy Raineesha Williams: White people are crazy.

Deputy Raineesha Williams: Y'know what I'm sayin'?

Deputy Trudy Wiegel: Lt. Dangle and I have a very special relationship. We're like a brother and sister...except a brother and sister who have sex.

Talking to a Klan member

Deputy Jones: OK, let me tell you...D.T.A.M.S: Don't take another motherfucking step.

Terry: I heard a rumor.

Deputy Trudy Wiegel: What's that, Ter?

Terry: Mexican werewolves are coming up from Mexico and selling crack.

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: Hey, Terry! Sheriff's Department!

Terry: Hey, guys!

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: Hey.

Terry: What's goin' down?

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: Well, I'll tell ya what's goin' down, Terry: you know that they've installed a camera right here at this red light here.

Terry: Oh my God!

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: Yeah, and it takes a picture whenever someone runs a red light.

Terry: Oh wow, that's awesome, it's like the future is here.

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: It is awesome.

Deputy Travis Junior: So you know why we're here?

Terry: Why, was there a fire?

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: You've been chargin' three bucks, you run up when the car is at a red light, and you give a HJ during the red light.

Terry: Oh my God, that sounds, that's not something that I would ever do.

Deputy Travis Junior: Except we've got about...

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: We got about 38 photos of you and that's only last night.

Terry: Well, I can see how you would think that, but I sell... oranges.

Deputy Travis Junior: You sell oranges?

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: You sell oranges?

Terry: Mmhm!

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: I'll take some.

Deputy Travis Junior: Yeah, I'd like some too.

Terry: I've sold out, I've sold out of my oranges...I run out and people are like beep beep, I go OK, and say you're driving and I just put it in their lap.

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: Well...

Deputy Junior: I don't know about that.

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: Come on, Terry.

Terry: I can't, I have to call my girlfriend... listen I don't even know what you're talking about.

Begins tugging Terry away on his roller skates

Deputy Travis Junior: We're talking about you giving hand jobs at three bucks a pop at this red light up here, that's what we're talking about.

Terry: OK, OK, a hand job is still a job, OK?

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: Come on, easy does it, Xanadu it right into the car.

Terry: You Xana-Don't it!

Lieutenant Jim Dangle: Did he just say "Xana-Don't it?"

talking to a junior-high class

Deputy Trudy Wiegel: Now, I don't care if you wear mini-skirts. I don't care if you wear Dungarees. I don't care if you're good at basketball, I don't care if you're fun to be around. But you can rest assured that every one of you, at some point, is going to be raped.