Once in a while when I know my Mypos family is all together then I wish I was in my chair at the table, because Papa sits here and Uncle Stavlos sits there and it’s a place of honor, you know.
All S1
Oh, my Lord!
I have... a plan.
Watch... and learn.
Who'd ever heard of a burglar wearing a baseball cap?
Okay, okay, fine! You didn't lock me in the closet, there was no-one at the door, we are not having this conversation. This whole day has been some cosmic cruelty joke. Ha ha, fine! Oh, and if Tony Perkins shows up wearing a house-dress and carrying a very large kitchen knife... Tell him I'm in the shower!
Having Twinkacetti as a houseguest. It's like Tokyo inviting Godzilla for dinner.
W-well, actually, there is something I... I wanted to talk to you about. But things have been so crazy around here that... it just hasn't been a-a good time. But, I just wanted to-" [He looks and sees that Balki has fallen asleep] "I just wanted to know what you thought about Jennifer and I, you know? I dunno, is she interested in me, or...?
Look, this is America. We make things a lot more complicated.
You know, having a ghost would explain so many things. Like how when you open the refrigerator, the light goes on.
Sometimes late at night I start to make sense.
... We have the element of surprise.
You're right there, cousin: even we don't know what we're doing.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Perfect Strangers pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.